The Yearning

Close My Eyes Forever

Sometimes, it's hard to hold on; so hard to hold on to my dreams.
It isn't always what it seems, when you're face to face with me.
~Lita Ford & Ozzy Osbourne~
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When he caught me my body ached for him, I always wondered what it'd feel like to have him hold me like that; now I know but it was a fleeting feeling.

It didn't take long for us to pick up right where we left off; I didn't have the willpower to stay away from him and I was again his 'shoulder to cry on'.

The last time he called there wasn't a 'hey', 'how you doing?', or 'what's up with you?', he went straight into a rant about Juliet.
I don't even know what it was about, I had a really bad day that started when I got up and his call topped it off.

Mid-sentence, I screamed, "ANDY STOP!".

"What?"

"Just stop! First Scout, now Juliet... I can't take it anymore! Did you know I've loved you since the first day I saw you? I was too scared to tell you and you were too God-damned blind to see it, but the actual trouble is I was too stupid to let it go! But not anymore... I hate you! God I hate you! Don't ever call me again!", I cried and hung up.

Well, I finally told him how I felt, but it wasn't how I imagined it to be.

ANDY'S POV:

I was stunned. I don't know what to do. I can't think... First I lost my girlfriend and now my best friend.

I spent the entire night trying to figure things out, each time I started thinking about Juliet, my mind drifted to Casey.
I tried to recall every moment we were together, wondering what I missed, any clues that she loved me. She was right, I had been too blind to see it.
It's clear to me now, the look she wore the day I left said it all.

Why didn't I call her when I was going to? I thought I was missing her friendship, maybe I was just missing her.
By dawn I knew what I wanted, but I've probably missed my chance.

For months now, I've tried everything; she won't talk to me, she won't see me, and I'm at the end of my rope.