A Gloomy April

Chapter 8: Infidelity

Whenever I act, I always have to remind myself that it is just that; acting. I get so absorbed in my roles that I think that I am these characters. Some may say that this proves that I am a top actress, but I think it is just a huge problem.  I was falling hard for Woohyun and in real life too.

When he acted, he seemed very sincere and I felt like he was actually like his character. He was masculine and confident, but he could also be cute and shy at times. One of my favorite scenes we filmed was a park scene where he had to push me on the swings for about half an hour.  His arms must have been tired, but he did not complain and he seemed as if he actually had fun.  We also improvised afterwards by chasing each other and fooling around the jungle gym. This scene became a hit amongst the viewers and it was all the rage because it seemed so natural and it honestly was unplanned.

Before filming a kiss scene, the director and Woohyun approached me. The director started by saying, "I know you have not done a real kiss scene since the one with Woohyun three years ago. Fans are probably dying to see one. Even if you are in a relationship, I am sure that he would understand. It is just acting."

Woohyun added, "I'm fine with it if you are."

I briefly thought of how Taecyeon would react and then pushed it to the back of my mind. Before I could lose my confidence, I agreed. We began right away. Woohyun's character was supposed to be "studying" with me at my house when we get caught up in each other and begin fervently kissing. After he calls me to my bed to ask about a math problem, we look into each other eyes.

He slowly touched my hand and then leaned in extra slowly. His soft lips met mine and it was an extremely gentle kiss. I could not help naturally reacting and making my lips match his; until he started to suck on my lips. He kissed me like I was oxygen and I felt like I was finally living. I felt fiery hot inside. It became very passionate and we only stopped a few seconds after the director told us to. The director was more than satisfied.

Woohyun offered to drive me back after filming and I accepted his offer 99% because of the fact that we were coworkers, but also 1% because I liked him in a different way. He opened the door for me to get in and when we got to the dorms, he broke the silence to speak.

"I know you are in a relationship with Taecyeon, but I like you. I see the way he looks at you and rather than love, it seems like an obsession. You do not have to feel like you are walking on eggshells if you are with me. I am sorry to shake you up inside like this, but I needed to confess before it is too late. Please accept my heart."

I was upset that Woohyun had noticed my strange relationship with Taecyeon and I felt my heart sway.

"I'm sorry Woohyun, but not right now. Please give me some time."

Woohyun respected what I said and drove off, but not before waving goodbye.

That night I could barely sleep because I was so confused and distraught about what to do. I thought it would be best to end things with Taec as soon as possible, but I felt that if he asked me to be with him, I would sway towards him and if Woohyun asked me to be with him, I would sway towards him. I could never see myself two-timing though. In the end, I decided to meet Taecyeon to break up because I had swayed and did not truly love him. He also hurt me physically. It had been about two weeks since we last saw each other and I had planned to meet him for coffee. Before I could, he called me.

"Hello? Taec-oppa?"

"Hey Tina. How are you?

I rushed to say what I had to. "I'm breaking up with you. I no longer love you like I used to." Then I hung up.