Flor

Intimacy

ALEX

My fucking body feels like there's acid in it. I know how I get. Violent. I black out. Flor's used to nothing but violence and I don't want her to see me be like that.

Christian's handling it. I keep telling myself that. We're in my car and I'm driving back home. Flor's sleepy head is leaning on her seatbelt asleep. She handled it. I can't help but think what a bad ass she is. I'd be proud to have her be mine. I relax at the thought of that.

There's music softly playing. The radios on. The sky is dark and the clock reads midnight. I sigh. Jesus fucking christ. Too much fucking shit has happened today. My mind wanders to other events that happened today. Flor's soft naked body on me. Stop. I internally grumble. I don't want to get a hard on in the middle of driving. The road to my house is peaceful at night. The stars and moon shine and everything else is in the dark. Skyler. He hit Francisco after he saw Francisco on her. I feel acid as I swallow.

I want Skyler to get his ass beat too. Flor's recounting of her and Skyler's story from the beginning comes into my mind. It all makes sense. The way he would hurt her then be the only one who could comfort her. The one that protected her and was the only one there. Yet he was the one she needed protection from. I want to be mad. I am mad. I saw the bitch that hurt Flor. Made her believe everything is her fault made her feel like she had to be hard and hide herself. Made her feel trapped and lose hope for her life. Believe she is worth nothing.

The recounting of Skyler pleading her telling her how much he loved her. Then the recounting of the pain, guilt and shame he left her with. It's exactly his role. He's a villian in her story and he comes in to defend her. Protect her. Because his mind can't help but hurt the ones he loves. My thoughts come back into my surroundings.

Pulling up to my gated drive. I drive in slowly so I don't wake her up abruptly. I park next to the front door and turn the ignition off. I relax against my seat and breathe. Motherfucker touched her. Relax. Don't let her see you mad. I don't want her thinking she has to be afraid of me. That would break me. I look over at ber sleeping body. Her nose and lips look so fucking cute.

I unbuckle my seatbealt and get out. I close the door gently and walk around the front of my car before opening the door for her. She slightly stirs. I unbuckle her seatbealt. I grab her phone in her lap and cradle her. She wraps her arms around my neck and I pull her out. She smells so fucking good. I close the door with my side and walk towards the entrance. I put my key in the lock of the front door and turn the knob. I push the door open Flor still dozing off in my arms. I close it behind me and drop the keys on the small glass table next to the entrance.
She stirs again and lifts her head off of me as I enter my room. I place her on the bed. She sits up a sleepy look on her face. Her eyes are slightly glazed. She looks at me.

"Is everything okay? Where's Christian." I know what she's thinking. Maybe he did something and is gonna end up in jail again. "Everyone's good. They're all home." She closes her eyes and nods. "Okay." her soft voice mumbles. I hand her my hoodie again. It's a black one this time. She takes off her earrings and necklace. Placing them on the nightstand. Her makeup wipes are still in here from last time. I pull a wipe out and drag it softly across her lips.

She relaxes into my hand. Like she feels comfort. If there's one thing about her is that her love language is acts of service. Maybe because she never got to experience the small things of having parents growing up. She had to do everything herself. I remember my mother's touch still. The comfort she provided me with.

I also remember when she was dying. How she told me to be a better man than my father. If I ever met someone and fell in love to respect them. Love them. Only commit to anyone if you will hold that commitment. Don't hurt anyone because of my own hurt. I told her I doubt I'd ever love anyone. Ever get married or have kids. I knew that I wasn't the type to be able to do that since I was young. I look at Flor, her presence overtaking my room. The room that was always untouched and cold.