Trigger warnings
Eating disorders
Dysphoria
Suicidal thinking
Mentioning self harm
AbuseTommy's pov:
I sat at the table with the mound of food infront of me, I feel so disgusting in my own body right now, weither it be dysphoria or my eating disorder, I had no clue. My father glanced over at me while I was staring at my food."Tiana eat your food I worked hard on this" he said in an unhappy and threatening tone. I nodded slowly as I picked up my fork and started picking at my food and took a few bites then set my fork down again.
"Come on Tiana are you fucking kidding me?!?! I worked my ass off so you would like it you greedy bastard!" My father screamed at me then I felt his hand leave a mark on my face. It stung badly.
"Eat it or else it will be worse for you in the end" my father commended. I ate quickly after that, I didn't want to upset my father more than he already was.
After I finished my meal I asked to be excused, my father said it was fine. I went up to the bathroom and locked the door. I turned the water in the tub on and knelt infront of the toilet. I did what I knew I needed to do.
I wiped my face off and flushed the toilet. Then turned off the water in the tub and sat against the door for a bit. Tears started streaming down my face as I slowly got up,unlocked the door and walked to my room.
As soon as my door shut I heard my father storming upstairs and sluring something out before hearing a glass bottle smash against my door.
"OPPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR TIANA!!!" My father slured other other side of my door. I instantly opened the door as my heart pounded in my chest.
As soon as the door was oppen he came in and smacked me across the face, but it's fine I know he doesn't love me, I know I diserve whatever he does to me, because all I diserve in life if pain, nothing more.
My father pushed me to the floor then threw the rest of his half smashed bottle on the ground and breaking it more. He grabbed a shard of the glass and yelled
"YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT I JUST GOT YOUR REPORT CARD ANDYOURE FAILIMG ALL OF YOUR COURSES" he dug the peice of glass into my stomach again and again until he was satisfied with his final product of my torn bleeding body.
"I know you wanted me to do this I've seen some of the shit you have done to your arms, go deeper next time, hopefully you'll bleed out and die, I wish you were never born you are the worst daughter in the world and you are the biggest mistake I've ever made" my father spat at me before slamming my door closed leaving me alone bleeding and crying in my room.
I was so worthless and annoying and stupid and nobody loves my the world would be so much better if I were dead. I hate every aspect of myself. I hate my body my mind my attitude my feelings my everything. My father is right I'm useless and an annoying stupid little botch that no one could ever love.
I had been crying in my room alone for a while when I heard my phone buzz like someone was calling me.
I checked my phone to see who it was and it was wilbur so I answered.
"Tommy, are you alright? Phil Tubbo Techno Dream and I have been trying to get ahold of you for the last three hours" wilbur half yelled on the other end of the phone
"I was eating and sleeping that's all, you guys don't have to worry about me constantly" I responded quickly hoping he didn't realize I had been crying based on my voice
"I know I need to worry Tommy you are only 16 and going through a lot" he responded in a sympathetic voice
"Do you think maybe I could go to your house over my break maybe...?" I asked quietly
"Of course man, go ask you mum and dad to see of you constantly here" wilbur responded happily.
I hung up the phone and went downstairs and went up to my father.
"Sir, do you think I would be able to go to Wil's house for the break?" I asked nervously
"Get your shit and get out" he told me so I did exactly that I texted will to come get me and packed clothes, most of it was just long sleeve clothes and long shorts and wil said we might go swimming too so I packed a blue long sleeve shirt and a pair of swim trunks and my razor blades.
I ran downstairs and walked outside to wait for Wil to come pick me up from the shit hole I am forced to call home, that's the exact opposite of what it is, home, home is supposed to be a place where I feel loved and welcomed, not hated and scared. A huge ear to ear smile broke out onto my face when I saw Wil's car turn onto the beginning of my street. I ran onto the concrete and watched as Wil's car roll to a stop at the front of my house.
917 words
Hello everyone I'm sorry that I haven't posted in a bit but that's because I've had a lot of school work and softball games recently I am so sorry about that also it's hard to come up with ideas for the chapters every day but I'm gonna try to post another chapter again later tonight or early tomorrow. So have a lovely morning afternoon or evening eat something drink water and take care. ❤
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