T. B. O. S. [ꜱ. ɢɪɴᴛᴏᴋɪ x ʏᴏᴜ]

Epilogue

Ah, shit.

I'm stuck again.

Reading the same phrase for twenty three times and nothing hit the nails yet. Dull orbs daze peculiarly on the certain white blank screen digging a blackhole through the skull of mine. Yet, a single alphabet nor a structured grammar words have been pulled out yet in a perfect metaphor syntax linguist of my genius brain.   

Yeah, cool isn’t it? While the due gonna end next week and here I am, fucked up by my own block and moaning mess in front of the tablet. Great job, fool. What a great job. 

Vibrate killing my whine and I perk the name popping on the phone screen. 

Talking about the devil. Damn, that noisy fly really knows how to break the wall of my sanity. 

Lazily, I tap back the green call in icon. Putting my earpod so the librarian doesn't barbeque me, I let her burst first. 

"Yo~ are you done yet–"

End call… is all that I want to do eagerly but I know that's not a good choice to run from the ruckus. Dreadful sigh leaving my breath, I took a cup of the cappuccino and sipped it before replying to the editor.

"It's happened again."

"What happened… oh– What? You kidding? It’s next week and I can’t afford to convince the chief to drag any longer than we are supposed to."

"I know. Just…. I need more references, I guess? The ideas isn't enough, I need to feel it from experiencing .... the affection…?" Why did I end with a question mark?

A stillness breaking through the call, sensing she might be scheming for the materials. Well, she does that everytime I have those blocks. At least she’s contributing something besides long whining over. 

Being a hot best seller author is the best feeling and the best dream ever by every person but not maybe they gonna questioning themselves why would they set up their feet to walk in this road full with thorny roses sticking out everywhere when the writer block hits a truck on them. 

"The main lead is currently developing her new feel, right?"

"Yup."

"And you are stuck either wanting to make the main or the man to lead first, correct?"

"Subconsciously, yes."

"How about you try on yourself being the main?"

"Huh?"

"Yeah. Like how you when she experiences the feeling of depending on someone."

"You mean I need a person to have a crush on?"

"Don’t you have one?"

Zipped. 

"W-Who?"

"That guy! Stop being dumb. I know you have a soft spot on him."

Forgive me but I definitely, forbid myself to not have any deal with the person she means. That was not a good idea and for some reason, it's for my emotional sakes.

Yes, I am thinking about a certain person but I chose to not involve more than I could want to. The validity of my own reason? I don’t know. 

"I….have nothing to do with him anymore."

"And would you care to explain about the nocturnal emissions you had after that day after you went out with that mystery man?"

Maybe I need to brainwash her mind later to erase the shameful memories she accidentally witnessed when she broke into my house without my concern.