To Have & To Hold

The Planting Of The Seed

Marie's POV: 

It was the day of the surrogacy, i met Drew and Halle at the hospital, as we walked into the waiting room. Drew walked over to me, "how are you feeling?" he said, as my heart was racing. Not just because he was standing next to me, but because today was the day, this entire agreement was actually happening. I was terrified to be pregnant as well as terrified to be pregnant with Drew's child. I always thought it would be our child, but sometimes things don't always work out in our favor. "I'm hanging in there.." i said, as we took a seat. "Just breathe, everything's gonna be okay" he said, as i sighed shakily, before nodding. 

Halle was flipping through a pregnancy magazine right next to me, as Drew was on the opposite side of me for moral support. I was trying to contain my nervousness, but i couldn't keep my hands from shaking. Drew reached over and took my hand, as he held it between our chairs so Halle couldn't see. I looked over at him, as he mouthed: "breathe" as i smiled, and nodded. Doing so again, i could feel his fingers entwine with mine, which made my heart rate slow down. 

That was, until my name was called. 

I changed into a hospital gown as Halle sat in the room with me, as i climbed onto the hospital bed and laid down. She took my hand in hers for a moment, to comfort me. It was a bit awkward at first, cause we had never held hands before. But it soothed the situation for me. The nurse came in and elevated my legs, i took more deep breaths as i stared at the ceiling. My mind kept on asking how this was literally happening right now. As my heart was too busy trying to picture this being me and Drew's baby. I tried to allow my mind to clear, the overthinking was making things worse, but i couldn't help but remember my dream of Drew and i starting a family together. Another nurse came back with the sperm and Halle's egg to put in me. 

"Don't worry Marie, you'll feel some pressure but that's it" Dr. Martin said, as i nodded slowly. A few moments later, they inserted the semen mixture inside of me. It felt strange and foreign to me, i had always assumed i would get pregnant some day the old fashioned way. "She'll need to stay elevated for a few hours just to make sure everything goes smoothly" Dr. Martin said, as Halle nodded. They then left us alone, as we waited. "I'm gonna head back to the waiting room and let Drew know we're almost done here. Give you some space to change back into your clothes" Halle said, "okay.." i whispered, as she smiled. "Thank you again Marie, honestly" she said, as i smiled. She then left me, as i sighed looking up at the ceiling again. 

After the few hours had gone by, a nurse came in to check me, before discharging me to leave. So i changed back into my clothes, and retreated to the waiting room, to see Drew and Halle. They gave me a ride back home, "text us if anything happens, and in the next few weeks come over and we'll take a pregnancy test together" Halle said, as i agreed and we hugged once more. "I know i shouldn't be, but i am so excited and praying this will work" she said, as she pulled away from me. "It's our last hope" she said, as i felt fear nag at my stomach again. "Take care of yourself" Drew said, as i nodded. "Please" Halle said, as i promised i would. 

I couldn't sleep that night, my mind had no off switch, as i had to keep up with every thought that was swirling through my head. This was crazy, the fact that i could actually have Drew's baby growing and developing inside me right now was insane. I actually hadn't really thought about starting a family right now, or becoming a mother at the moment. But it wasn't like i was going to be a mother, i was just carrying someone's child for now. I wondered and feared that i was going to become attached to the baby in some sort of way. Like i would see myself as the baby's mother instead of Halle, since i gave birth to them. I really hoped not. 

My thoughts continued to keep me up, as i brought my hands to my stomach and pondered some more. The thought about telling my parents what i had agreed to do, made me sick to my stomach. Cause i knew for a fact my mother of all people would lose her mind. But i was an adult now, fully capable of making my own decisions. So i decided to tell Allison instead, at least she would have a better experience at reacting first hand, than my family.