Lovesick - Nikolai and Fyodor AU fanfic

Chapter VI

And as Fyodor said, the three moved in a week. Nikolai insisted for Fyodor and Sigma to call him dad, be they would have prefered to die instead of calling him that. Even a blind person would have understood that their new house was pretty expensive, it had four floors, and every of thhose had a bedroom, a bathroom, and a balcony. 

"I can't really give an answer to why Dazai stopped using this house and even moved without selling it!"

Nikolai complained while putting random things in the kitchen from their bags.

"You know he is rich and he has rich friends. He is the type of person that if finds 100 dollars on the street he'd just leave those there."

Fyodor dealt with Nikolai's complainings, while helping Sigma bringing their moving boxes around the house.
They had a little fight that day about the rooms. Nikolai wanted to sleep in the same floor as Fyodor, but he obviously refused cause he wanted his room to be his room. 

"And it's not like I can't just come into your room everytime I want, so there's no need to leave a whole room empty uh?"

"Yeah but should a father fuck their legal child? Do you have a daddy kink Fedya???"

Sigma looked geniuenly disgusted and got into his room to finish putting the clothes in their place. He didn't brought many things, not that he held many, he thought that a few shirts and ten pair of pants were enough. He also brought a few meds in case he had troubles with Nikolai's... problems. He used to have attacks when the two friends were youngers, now they were gone, but Sigma could not risk it. Especially with Fyodor, wich didn't know about all the mental illness Nikolai got diagnosed before illegally leaving the mental hospital. But that's for another time. 

"Sig, you think we should go out at dinner?"

Dostoveskij entered the room, followed my Nikolai.

"Yeah, we don't have a shit to eat here at home. At that fucking airport they confiscated any food I had. I thought they wanted me to starve to death."

"It's ok son, we'll go out for dinner like a happy family!!"

Sigma and Fyodor glared at Gogol.

"How does a pizza sounds?"

But obviously, none of them had the motivation and energyto go to a resturant. So they went to the nearest store and baked that pizza. The kitchen after that was a mess, but at least they ate something.
Nikolai's pizza was slightly burnt, it had a lot of cheese and almost zero tomato souce, the exactly opposite of Fyodor's, wich didn't have cheese at all. While Sigma's one was just... a normal pizza. They ate on the couch while watching a film and slowly fell asleep. 

It was cold. I felt terrified. I looked around to search for Sigma but I could not see anyone. Did I got lost again? Shit Sigma was gonna kill me. I literally forced him to get here and now I lost him, I was sure he would have got mad, so I put together the few energies left in my body and started searching for my friend. Everything looked dangerous, I felt trapped into those leefs and that freezing swirl. I stopped and sat on a rock holding my face with my hands, putting on hard stress my memory trying to remember where I lost him in the first place, when I heard soft footsteps. I looked around. No one to be seen. I turned around. Still no one. And then so, I began to panic. There was someone with me and I had no clue about who they were or their intentions. I could scream, maybe Sigma would have heard me. Maybe... maybe it was Sigma itself. 

<Sig?... Is it you?>

No answer. Definetly not him. I took a big breath and tried to calm down, maybe all those emotion made up fake sounds. Then a hand covered my mouth. I tried to scream, useless. I am only 14. I don't deserve this, I didn't deserve all the pain this world give me. I don't wanna live anymore. I shut my eyes and took a knife out of my coat, triying to stab the person behind me.
Then I heard a sound. I hit them. But not in the somach, because they hugged me.

<I apologize dear. I don't own a choice.>

The person whispered. I tried to scream Sigma's name once again, the world started becoming dark, at that point I was crying and then-

Nikolai woke up shaken by Sigma. It felt as if he did not breath for hours, his chest was pounding and he was sweating. Did he have another nightmare? Probably. He looked around the room. Fyodor was looking at him with a skeptical face, and Sigma was worried as always.

"I'm sorry friends, it was just a bad dream."

"It was not Nik. We heard you speaking. You still dream of what happened that day?"

Silence filled the room. It cringed the Sigma wich said sorry, hugged his friend and just left to his room. Leaving Fyodor and the other alone.

"It's ok Kolya. I already knew what happened that night. Just give Sigma a bit he's probably shocked."

"Owww, i'm sad now."

Fyodor chuckled as Nikolai sat on the couch in a more comfortable positition to give the other some space to sit with him.

"Are you actually sad?"

They looked at each other.

"I am. But it's not about PTSD, I do not care about my past. I just didn't really want to let Sigma think that that was all his fault. Now he's gonna start with his depressed shit."

"Oh is that it? I can try to talk to him later if you think it's needed."

Nikolai nodded.  The two looked at each other. Their eyes stared deeply into the other's soul as if it was a whole new galaxy, as if it was a pure masterpiece. Fyodor slowly hold Nikolai's hand and pressed his lips over the other's. Gogol's hands went on the other's head and started to sweetly touch his hair. Fyodor turned away from the kiss and tried to say something, but was cutoff as Nikolai pushed over him again. Hands on the clown's wrist, the two fell on the couch, never letting their lips apart unless to breath. That kiss was everything Nikolai has ever wanted from the start. He wanted to feel happy and think about what was doing more to remember it, but his mind could only say one thing: "Fyodor." 

"Kolya..."

They stopped kissing.

"Sigma's in the other room."

"It's not like we were gonna fuck on the couch. Go talk to him by the way, I'll just go back asleep."

Nikolai spoke. He was a bit pissed off, he wanted to kiss his love more.

"Alright. Good night."

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Sorry it's short, I know I promised longer chapters lol, but y'know... I wanted to publish this an exact week after the other one. Also im on vacations, so it's hard to find time to write. I hope to get time to write longer chapters soon! :)