Back To Me || Book 2 [N. Romanoff × Fem Reader]

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟎𝟗

"They're planning to kill me the day you went missing?" Natasha wasn't questioning, instead she was thinking outloud as I show her the things that I have gathered through the years.

"If I'm right, which ninety-nine percent of the time I'm not, but if we can stop him and destroy whatever madness he created then we might have a shot to saving your ass," I stated while keeping my eyes on her.

She smirked in amusement, "Look at you saving my ass, never did I thought that you still care."

"Incase you forgot, I've been saving your ass the moment I met you," I retorted along with a playful eyeroll. "But that doesn't mean that I don't hate you, I still do," I added sternly, and to my surprise her smirk never faltered.

"Good, 'cause you don't hate what you don't love," She confidently stated as I fully turned my back on her.

"I have to ask you something though," She started after a long moment of work in silence.

"Yeah?" I replied, keeping my eyes on a pile of paper.

"Did you like 2012 me better?" It was evident in her tone that she was hesitant but she asked me anyway.

And if I'm being honest, I do, I like 2012 better than her but what's the difference, it is still her, only Nat2012 was the person I fell inlove with and Nat2023 is the person who I loved, past and present. She changed and so did I, and that makes us even.

I looked up at her with a grin on my face as she raised both of her eyebrows questioningly. "Why the sudden interest?" I mused.

She looked away bashfully, "I'm not interested," The change of her tone says so, but while she was looking away, I was admiring her, it may took me a while for my response but there is no denying that, -as cliché as this sounds-, she's still my favorite view.

But then, "Not really," I answered dumbfoundedly and I was shocked at my own words since that wasn't supposed to be my answer.

When she looked back at me I immediately widened my eyes, knowing that she wasn't going to stop anytime soon.

"Not really? Does that mean you like me better?" She asked in amusement and I was the one who looked away embarrassed this time.

"No?" I wasn't sure, and somehow I felt nervous. Her stare burned on me as my cheeks begun to flush and I didn't know what to do.

"No...?" She trailed off, voice sounding mockingly and I had no other option than to look back at her and try to look serious, even though my cheeks were failing me.

"Do you take fifty-fifty as an answer?" I offered, sounding like a little kid bargaining for a bag of candy.

She stayed quiet for a while. "You're cute," she blurts out, and as if I was a coloring book, the pink-ish color on my cheeks were gone and the mood shifted differently, and Natasha noticed. "What I meant is that..." She tried to correct it but I was no longer interested in the conversation as I turned my back on her. "Nevermind," She added like a whisper.

It wasn't her fault, she complemented me but all I felt was guilt and pain. I couldn't really tell which is which but what I could tell is that her and I are not ready, it's as if we're better off as friends than a couple. But like I said, it was just a simple compliment, it's not her fault.

The day passed by quickly and before I knew it, we were back in the apartment. Taliyah was in her room doing her own thing and Natasha was cooking for dinner while me, well, I was guilt-tripping myself inside the bathroom, water running down on the drain to make it sound like I was taking  shower, but in reaity I wasn't.

I was on the floor with a ciggarette on my hand, filling the air with smoke. It was unhealthy I know, but I just relapsed, Natasha would kill me if she finds out but I doubt that she'll ever know.

"Ma," Taliyah knocked on the door. "Dinner's ready," She yelled from the other side.

"One second," I yelled back as I heard her footsteps drift away to another room.

Five minutes later, I couldn't seem to stand up. My voice failed me as I couldn't yell for help, but thankfully I was able to grab onto the sink. As I was about to move, my legs suddenly felt like jelly and my body was numb, and before I knew it, my head hit the bath and my eyes fluttered close.

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