Mommy

Chapter 54: Fading Away

Rosabeth was quiet.

We thought she might've been sick or something was wrong with her—and we tried our best to see what was wrong. But we found no clue of any illness, and we decided she was just a peaceful little one. And that was a blessing for all of us. One cry out of her at the wrong moment, and she could be a victim to Mommy's wrath.

Carson never left Anna's side after the trip to the bathroom. He was all smiles and I could practically see the affection and love for the child pour out of him. He would pick her up and hold her little fingers and call her things like 'Rosie', and Anna only found it funny, letting a few smiles and laughs escape. But after a while, her smile slowly began to fade—maybe because she was tired.

The blankets and sheets we all had were used to clean up the blood, so Anna asked Kai and I to go upstairs to the attic, to find more. We quickly did so, not wanting to upset Anna.

There were blankets lying everywhere, but most of them were covered in dust and decomposing bugs, and we didn't want to take the risk of getting the child sick—so we decided to look in sealed boxes for the blankets, hoping we would find something appropriate.

The first few boxes held nothing of use, and I felt relief when I opened a box full to the brim of baby blankets and sheets. I took them out, and opened them up, shaking whatever dust it had off. I placed them back in the box, and I was about to head back downstairs before I heard Kai laugh, saying, "Cool! This one looks just like me!"

I walked over to him, curious as to what he was looking at. He was looking in a large, antique, toned wooden box which seemed the lid had been broken off seconds ago. He was holding a doll that looked just like him, with porcelain skin and marble eyes—just a little smaller than a dinner plate I could feel the nostalgia and frustration for the loss and the memories rise up in me, and I snatched it away from him, my face growing red in anger.

His lip quivered as he saw my flash of anger and he backed away. "I-I'm sorry...I thought there would be blankets in there; it was easy for me to break open. I'm sorry Harper. I just thought-" He looked as though he was about to cry, and I gave it back. I didn't mean to react so rash, I just couldn't help it after I realized what they were.

I walked up to the box and looked in, shaking in terror. There were dozens of dolls, more dolls than there were people. I could feel my face pale, and I gasped. There was Anna, Alex...Jen. They looked sickeningly realistic and looking at them made me sick to my stomach. I reached in, and picked up a doll with olive eyes and brown hair—oddly misplaced with it's pasty skin.

It was me.

My arm shook, my hand tightening on its glass form. There were so many, so many I didn't recognize, so many that have died...

I dropped my doll back in the box, taking Kai's and putting it in the box as well. I shut the lid, my hands shaking harder than before. I felt sick, and I could hardly breathe. Remembering number three made me want to cry, and it hurt to think about it. All the people that died here, they were waiting there.

"What's wrong?" Kai asked, and I shook my head, shrugging it off. He wouldn't understand.

I took the box of blankets back into the room, giving it to Anna. She wrapped Rosabeth in a pastel pink blanket, giving her a kiss on the forehead. "Carson, do you think you can hold her for a minute?"

He smiled, nodding and taking Rosabeth in his arms. Anna laid down, facing away from them and closing her eyes. She seemed weak, and tired. She looked sick. She looked as though she wanted to be alone—and that she didn't want Rosabeth with her

No, this isn't the good time to tell her about Alex. She's upset, and she will think I'm lying if I tell her such a thing.

Hours passed, and she still didn't move from that position. She wasn't sleeping, for the fact her eyes were open and she would occasionally hum. But I knew something was wrong. Every time I would look at her, I puke see silky tears run down her face. She was trying to hide it—but she hurt. She was heartbroken, and she would have to raise Rosabeth without her father.

Carson let me hold Rosabeth, and I smiled, watching as the child tried to grab onto strand of hair that fell down my face. Carson laughed, gently patting her head. He acted as though it was his child. He looked like he loved Rosabeth more than Anna did. But maybe the real, happy Anna would kick in soon. She would be back, and fall in love with Rosabeth like a mother should.

Carson tended to her every needs, bringing her water and changing out the blankets. He was like a father to Rosabeth, and that only made Anna more quiet.

Something was wrong.

Days went by, and she only faded away more. Carson was basically taking care of the child now, and it didn't even seem like it was Anna's anymore. Anna looked as though she was trying to distance herself away from not only her child, but us too. Even though she barely spoke with us or smiled, I could still see she had love for the child—and I could see the pain whenever she would hand her child away to Carson.

I tried as hard as I could to get Anna to smile or laugh or just bond with her child, but she never did. She seemed afraid to. She refused to get out of bed unless Mommy called for supper, and she would sleep all the time to avoid us. Even Carson began to get worried.

"She's just tired," he told me. "She'll be better soon." But no matter how much he told me that, I couldn't believe him. She wasn't just tired. Something was wrong with Anna.

Today she was just like normal, but something different happened. It was my turn to stay on watch while the others slept during the day, and I was struggling to keep my eyes open. Rosabeth was sleeping soundly, and I would do anything to be in her shoes right now. I thought Anna was asleep, until she opened her eyes and began to stare at me.

I watched her with concern. Maybe now was the time to tell her what number three Alex told me. Maybe this would cheer her up—I'm sure it would lighten her mood, just a little bit. But I could see the pain in her eyes, and I kept my thoughts to myself.

"Hey," she spoke softly, and my eyes connected with hers. I stayed silent, and watched as she sat up, looking at Rosabeth with sad eyes. Rosabeth was sleeping on the floor on a large pallet of folded blankets. She looked peaceful.

Anna winced as she sat up, her eyes landing on me. "I need to tell you something."

I nodded my head, anxious as I waited for her to continue. She sighed, taking a shaky breath.

"Promise me something. Promise me, if anything happens, you and Carson will be there for Rosabeth—please? I just—I just need reassurance."

I held my breath, fear swallowing me up. Why was she saying this? What does she mean by that? What does she think is going to happen to her? I was about to retort before she cut me off, holding her hand up.

"Please, don't think of me as a careless and unworthy mother when I say this, but I don't I could raise her very well without Alex. He was the one that kept me going, and I don't want to risk the child being alone if I go. And soon enough—I'll be eighteen too. I just need you to promise that you will be there for her—please?"

I could hear the pain in her tone and her eyes began to water. I knew she knew something that I didn't. She was planning this now, because she knew her end was near. No, I had to protect her now. I had to keep her here—I have to keep Anna alive so she can care for her child. She's not making sense.

But nevertheless, I nodded.