"If by Chance"

Chapter 7.

Mon POV.

"Can you atleast try to listen to me once in your life?.."

She stands up from the way she sits at the couch.

"Why would I??do I really have to update you everyday from where am I going and who's I am with the entire time??"

"If you're still mad at me then I'm sorry..I'm trying my best to be a good mom towards you but everytime I wanted to be close to you again you're always like this!!you're always avoiding me!!you're always making me feel invisible!!"

"Did I tell you to be good at me???maybe you already forgot it all but all of it is still fresh in my memories.."

"Mon,can you atleast talk to me the way you always did when you were a kid..?mom miss you so much,my child.."

If she does know how hard it is for me to live my life alone in London with dad, she'll understand why I'm being like this!!

However,there a thing inside of me that's move,it feels like a needle pinch my heart when I saw her cry.i haven't seen her like this before because when dad decided to leave her and bring me with him,I haven't seen her crying she just sit in the couch like a tired person and just watch us as we leave this house.

"I don't want to fight again,mom..I'd rather lock myself in my room.."

I ended the conversation and I was about to leave when I feel something touches my skin...

It was her,holding my wrist.

"Mon,I know it's hard for you to be here,I know that you're just here because Dew plead you,I know you're sick of me and I'm sorry if I'm always pissing you by getting close to you,I'm trying my best my child..I know I've never been a good mom towards you before but I'm here right now,I want us to start a new life again..please let yourself learn how to forgive me..."

I listened to every words she said without turning my head to look at her,I feel pity to mom, honestly.I want to take it all back but my pride is getting along the way..

"Did you know how hard it is for me to live out there,mom?"

I refered the London,and she take off her hands that's around my wrist.

"Did you know how hard it is for me to prepare to go to school each and everyday alone without a mom to wake me up every 6 in the morning while dad is busy at his work,he even had no time for me,we got a big house there bigger than this place but I was so alone,no friends,no one to talk to,no one to fuss when I'm tired of school,no one to cry on when someone bullies me,no one to tell that *mom I got a star at my wrist,teacher said I did a great job today* or *mom we had a assembly meeting tomorrow,teacher said you should attend*"

I can help but to let all of the pain inside of me,maybe I just really keep it for too long..

I turn my back at look at her,as I saw Khun Sam entering the living room,I don't care about anything right now all I want is to get rid of this stupid pain that I kept for almost half of my life..

"Did you know how hard it is for me to go to school alone while my classmates had their parents with them,holding their hands and let them brag those parents around the school..and did you know that when I graduated on highschool,dad wasn't there to attend it because he's at the hospital,and you??you're just right here at Bangkok, I'm a valedictorian during that time,I got almost 10 medals on where I am best at...and you know what's the most painful thing about it??"