the shooting stars and i || genssidy

chapter 17 || making up

"HE'S WHAT?"

genji had spit out the rice he had been saving for lunch. he couldn't comprehend what he had just been told. cassidy was being treated all the way at medbay.

genji couldn't even bring himself to sleep that night. he kept having hallucinations of cassidy walking towards him with a crooked, frowned face. he was tired, and quite depressed from what 'he had done'. he felt responsible for cassidy being left alone taken away by talon soldiers, shooting at him one by one. but somehow, yet, a miracle had emerged. cassidy was alive and well, being treated at the nearest hospital near headquarters.

he didn't know if he should head to cassidy immediately. no, it would be too soon, he thought.

genji's mind kept trailing back when he had left cassidy on the ground, bleeding out until he didn't have enough to move a muscle. his soft, sorrowful eyes were all genji could remember from that night. everything else only felt like a blur, with shouting and gunshots being fired.

"are you alright, mr. shimada?" the blackwatch attendant asked, who had given him the information. "do you need anything?"

genji's mind snapped back to him sitting at the cafeteria, with the attendant placing a shoulder on his hand, giving him a worried look.

"i'm—alright, no need for anything. t-thank you for telling me."

"no problem." the attendant headed out of the cafeteria and into the main office where most employees worked on their computers and saving information. genji slowly got up, having difficulty standing.

for the first time, he didn't know what to do. everything felt like it was all over the place with no organization. genji was constantly thinking about how he had blood on his hands for leaving cole to accept his fate. the guilt taking over his thoughts. he checked his watch to get his mind out of its fumbled mess. it was 2:30 pm. he didn't know how to react over all of this.

he went back to the front of his dorm room, still on the other side of the building. it was just as lonely as it was when gabriel separated him and cassidy. he put his hand on the doorknob but hesitated to turn it. he needed something to organize his thoughts, but working out wouldn't help him at all, and distractions didn't seem like a viable option.

he could go see moira.

he shook his head at the thought. she was busy and didn't need him pestering her with his indecisiveness. her answer seemed clear in his mind: "just go see him, idiot." despite that, he still found himself making his way all the way to the other side of the building. before he could even rethink and turn around, he found himself at her door, and felt himself regretting his choices when he heard her say "just a second!" from his knocking.

he heard a few sounds of clattering objects before she opened the door and greeted him. "oh, genji, it's you. i was just cleaning some things up. come in."

"is now a good time for you?" he stepped back, thinking it would be better to leave after all. "i can come back at another time. in fact, it was nothing important anyway..."

"no, no, you're quite alright." moira stepped to the side and motioned for him to come in with her arm and a polite smile. "come inside."

"ah, thank you, moira." he sighed, both from the dread and relief from the fact that there was no turning back now.

"you don't come and see my often," she questioned, taking a seat looking back at genji. "something the matter, shimada?"

"well, i um..." genji hesitated, not knowing how to even explain the situation he was in. he looked down, not knowing if he should blurt it out or let it out slowly, slumping onto the couch.