Two

The City: Part 6

I remember waking up, immediately thinking only one thing.

Why am I waking up?

Why wasn't I dead? Why couldn't I just die?!

I was lying on the ground, the world seeming to erupt around me in flames and ashes. Everything glowed so brightly that I actually missed the darkness. Even when I closed my eyes, the world was far too vibrant.

Everything burned. I could hardly breathe. When I gasped for breath, my lungs felt like they were being filled with toxic air. I just wanted this pain to stop. I wanted this all to end.

How could he do this to me?! 

Why?! Did I do something wrong?! Where did I mess up this badly?!

Everything I did, everything I worked towards, it was ALL to protect him. So why? 

The ONE time I relied on him to save me, he let go.

I fought for him, I KILLED people for him!

Oh dear Grambi, the thought of killing people disgusted me. I felt so gross just thinking about it. I wanted to hide in these flames and let them just eat me away forever. I wanted to fall back into that darkness and allow it to swallow me whole.

The whole world saw me as the dangerous, unstable 'one.' They all saw me the way society painted people with power. 

I didn't want Blumiere to see me that way too.

Did he see me that way?

Was that why he dropped me?

Or... was he just using me this whole time to get home. Was any of this even real?! Was he ever my friend?

Or am I just an idiot?

I thought he was genuine. I thought he was different. When I looked at him, I saw someone who society hadn't broken yet. I saw someone who still held onto the hope that things could get better. I saw someone like me. 

But in reality... my eyes deceived me. He wasn't like me. He was just like everyone else. When it came down to it, he chose to side with the rest of the world instead of with me.

I found the strength to open my eyes. I felt a burning sensation in my arms, only to see that my jacket was on fire. I quickly panicked, squirming to sit up and get it off, throwing it a few feet away from me as it continued to erupt into flames.

That jacket was one of the few things I owned. It almost felt like I was losing a best friend when it burned away. That jacket was always there to give me warmth and comfort. It never thought to betray me.

I felt tears well up in my eyes, which burned. Looking around myself, I could see all the flames and magic continuing to erupt. I could feel the pulsing power, and could only be surprised that I was still alive. The amount of physical pain I was in by far triumphed over any amount of pain I had ever felt before. It felt as if every molecule from within me was tearing itself apart and being infected, burning, and dying away. 

There was no way to get out of this. All I could do was wait for it to kill me. 

Why was this taking so long?!

I lay back on the ground, looking up. My vision was blurry and my eyes stung as more tears welled up. 

There was still so much I planned to do. So many promises I made. 

So many things that I'd never get to accomplish.

I'd never get to save that girl from the factory. I'd never get to help fix those poor bullies in the lab. I'd never get to free all the trapped animals and children who were in the woods.