Silver Linings

Chapter Seventeen - Setting the record straight

[17 June 2020]

⁂ ZHANG ZHE HAN ⁂

He had basically run off set when they had wrapped up for the day, leaving the styling assistants scrambling to collect all the various robes that he discarded in his trajectory towards his trailer. He had then stood in the shower with nothing but cold water for a full ten minutes until the water had run out, just like he always did. He knew it would get refilled a few times a day.

He had not only needed to cool himself down, and even that wasn't just because of the summer heat and thick robes, he had also needed to calm himself down. Afterwards, he had put on black basketball shorts and a white t-shirt before arranging the food that Jing Hua had left for them on the table, confirming all the spicy and non-spicy dishes. He knew that he was fussing over the food, but he would rather fuss over that than over whatever thoughts were trying to break free inside his mind. He had just discarded his sheet mask when Gong Jun showed up on his doorstep with a hole assortment of cut fruit, that had likely been able to feed half the cast. However, seeing his favorite apples amongst the fruit, any comments that his inner gremlin had wanted to make, faded even before they reached his tongue.

Of course Gong Jun had known to bring fruit. Is it a coincidence that my favorites are all here? I didn't bring anything when I went to him for dinner. I should have brought something... if mom knew she would disown me.

He reached for the fruit platters and decided on another piece of sliced apple. His gaze wandered towards Gong Jun—who was deep in his script—so he tried to focus on his own as well. They had been reading lines for an hour now but even though the reading was going well, he was still really distracted, and not only because of that hi-hi-hi that would warm his insides from time to time. And not because of the citrus scent that had descended inside his trailer alongside his co-star.

His eyes skimmed over the pages but not finding the lines he was looking for. All the words and dialogues blurred and jumbled as he flipped through the script and he was grateful that he had a natural ability to learn his lines, which meant that he had already memorized it all. And that even though it was his turn to carry the dialogues tomorrow, leaving his co-star to mostly act with his body language and facial expressions. His brain was just refusing to relax and get with tonight's agenda.

It was true that it had been a long day of filming and that he was tired from having been unbearably hot and uncomfortable inside the cave, but he had still insisted that Gong Jun come over for dinner. Their one-on-one dinner today and the 'family dinner' tomorrow was part of his plan. He wanted to figure out what was going on inside his head. No—he needed to figure out what was going on inside his head. Yu Xiang had already started to make comments after hearing he had invited Gong Jun over for dinner, and he was relieved that his assistant had a few days off. Did he feel guilty over keeping something like this from his best friend? Yes. But if he didn't even understand what was going on, how could he put it into words to try and explain it?

Had he actually missed Gong Jun during the past days? Was he actually jealous? Zhou Ye hadn't even been on site today, and he had still felt possessive when it came to Gong Jun's focus. He couldn't help but insert himself in the conversations that his co-star had with Huang You Ming. Even his body had betrayed him and just did whatever it wanted to get his co-star's attention—stooping so low as to imitating Gong Jun's movements when he was rehearsing his fighting scenes with Huang You Ming. He wanted his co-star's attention to be on him, at least some of it. It was embarrassing and he needed to get it under control, or at least understand it, before people—other than his childhood friend—started to notice.