The Codex: An Angel's Guide to Seducing A Human

The Codex Chapter One

Narius

No matter how hard I pushed with my hands or flapped my wings, I couldn't pull my butt out of the mud. Instead, the wet dirt sucked at my heavy armor, and I sank further into the muck.

I twisted and reached for the roots of an ancient oak tree, only to have them tease my fingertips. Panting, I paused to catch my breath and glanced at the Codex. The blue book, attached to the chain of my belt, was already drowning in the ever swallowing mud. I grasped her leather cover and pulled her out from the sludge. How... how did this happen? I asked.

The Codex whispered inside my head, Well, Narius, when an angel descends from the heavens and meets a storm... the angel loses. Badly.

What... what should we do?

Nothing. We're screwed, but not in the pleasant way.

I growled and pushed again with all my strength, but my legs plunged deeper into the brown ooze instead. "No!"

A twig snapped.

I lifted my head at the sound, and found a human girl standing before me, gawking at me like I had grown an extra pair of wings.

Well, we should ask her for help. I'm sure she'll help out a handsome angel in distress, the Codex said.

I stared at the human, her long black hair fluttering in the breeze. I don't trust her. She doesn't have any wings.

Of course she doesn't, you idiot. She's a human. Remember where we are!

The girl stood motionless. She tightened her grip on her wooden staff, topped with a sky-blue crystal orb that matched the color of her eyes.

We stared at one another in increasingly uncomfortable silence.

Don't just ogle her. Open your mouth. Speak!

I scratched my head, smearing the cool, pasty mud into my hair. Unsure on how I should talk to a human, I wiped my hands on my cuirass, cracked open the Codex, and leafed through her pages to the section on human interaction.

Following one of the odd rituals of human greeting recorded within, I smiled, thrust my hand into the sky, and waved like a flower being tickled by the wind.

"Don't be shy," I cooed, reciting what humans in books said to one another in times of need. "I am not going to hurt you. I just want to play. Come closer. I'll give you a candy."

"Ha!" The girl snorted. "Really? Candy?"

My brows knitted together, and I lowered my hand. Why is she laughing?

No, she thinks you're a pedophile.

Pedophile?

A man who loves children.

Before I could ask why anyone would laugh at such a nice man, the human took a deep breath. "So, what are you doing here?" she asked, resting her chin on the orb of her staff.

I pointed at my buttocks, where the armor had fused itself with the sticky earth and refused to let go. "Help."

The girl tilted her head. "Couldn't you just take your armor off?"

"No?" I glanced at the Codex, shocked. Hold on a second. Why didn't we think of this?

The Codex coughed. I knew that. I knew that all along. I was... umm... I knew that you would be saved by an extremely helpful damsel.

The human closed her eyes and sighed. "Right. Let's get you out the hard way." She muttered a few words and waved her staff. Following her motion, the ground around me grew cold, and the mud transformed into frozen dirt.