Tiny Dancer

Hotel for Misfits

Klaus ended up leading us to a suspicious looking building, but at this point, no one even questioned it. The only thing that I questioned was a that why everyone decided to squish into the revolving door. 

"Fucking idiots," I mumbled under my breath, as Benji, Grace and I went through  the second revolving door, the rest of the family just struggled as I watched in amusement," there were two entrances by the way," I mentioned once everyone was inside the building.

"Oh, Hotel Obsidian," Klaus cheered,"I missed you, you slutty old dame. Absorb her. Absorb her into your bosom," a disgusted look crossed my face at that comment,"You know, 'cause back in her heyday, she played host to world leaders. Roosevelt, Gandhi, Stalin, Gorbachev, Castro, King Olaf of Norway, one of the Kim Jongs, Tito, Dalai Lama, Elvis, and not one but two Kardashians, allegedly.

My attention wasn't on Klaus, it was on Allison who started walking away,"where you going," I called out

"I need to make a call," she responded not even stopping or looking back.

"Nowadays," Klaus continued,"she's just a flophouse, a party house for those of us not looking to be judged by society's rules and norms. 

"You mean, a place to hide," I clarified, looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Exactly! It's perfect! And the best part of it is, she's gonna look after us, no questions asked. Never ever," Klaus chirped.

"I may have questions," Grace spoke up while also raising her hand.

"Yeah, me too," Luther added on while looking around the place,"this place is weird."

Looking around it looks like a very fancy hotel with terrible designer choices, but it wasn't the interior design that was making me uncomfortable. It was the people inside it, all dressed like they were from different time periods, and they all stopped their previous activities the second that we stepped foot inside the building. Only to look at us strangely and observe our every step. Klaus may not question anything about this building, but I do.

"Chet! Mon frère! It's so great to see you. I'd like my usual suite, por favor," Klaus dramatically cheers as he rings the bell.

"I've never seen you before," Chet responds stiffly, clearly not taking a liking to us.

"See? Told you. Discreet," my naive twin brother whispered, thinking Chet's attitude was a positive thing.

 "Please stop scaring my dog," Chet responded, looking at Luther and Diego who were crowded around the dog.

"May I please pet your dog," Grace asked politely, an innocent gleam in her eyes. With a tight lipped smile and a nod, permission was given to Grace who giggled as the dog licked her fingers.

"We need some rooms, please," I said as I cleared my throat.

"Super,"Chet reaches for a sign that says cash up front before looking at us,"and how will we be paying today?"

"Fuck," I whispered under my breath," Empty your pockets."

There was a pause as everyone was rummaging their pockets, Klaus pulled out a bunch of condoms, Diego had his knife, Grace had a pocketed version of Alice and Wonderland, Vanya had peppermints, Five had a singular pebble, and I had a crumpled up Ladies Literature pamphlet.

"Put the knife away," Luther snapped, pushing Diego's hand down, before reaching into his own pockets,"why do I have a hairnet," he mumbled to himself.

With our hands out I noticed something the watches that Five handed out to me, Luther, Diego and himself. It has to get us something, even if it is just one room or two.

I sighed as I removed the watch from my wrist,"here," I handed the watch to Chet," what could this singular watch get us," I asked as he took the watched and observed it.

"Two rooms," he said looking at me.

"Perfect," I sighed with a relieved grin on my face,"we'll take those two, and," I trailed on grabbing Luther's wrist and removing his watch," two more," I said with a polite smile.

Chet took the other watch and handed me four keys,"mazel tov."

"Awesome thank you," I say as I take the keys before turning to the rest of my siblings," alright so four keys, the boys, the ladies, the couple and the children," I explain motioning to the keys before turning to Five," are you going to be rooming with the boys or the children?"

There's a pause and Five looks at Klaus and Luther, before turning back to me," the children."

Grace let's out a squeal as she wraps her arms around his waist, allowing Five to relax and a small smile to form on his face.

"All right. Well, lets Brady Bunch this bitch," Allison snaps, taking the key and ruining the tender moment between Grace and Five.

"Meet back in the bar in two hours so we can make a plan," Five says before Grace grabs him by the hand and yanks him up the stairs.

"I have a plan," Diego says trying to get our attention,"we attack the Sparrows, and we take back our house, and then we punch Dad a bit until he admits that we're better and he loves us more. Boom! Done!"

I just sigh and cup his cheek,"Your superhero complex is getting out of hand, honey. Just relax for a bit, those shit birds are staying put for a while. I bet they're as wiped as we are," I explain.

 "Really," Diego asks, a hopeful glint in his eyes.

"Yeah," I lie with a strained smile on my face, before pressing a passionate kiss on his lips," now come on, I want to put that hotel bed to good use."

"Now that's what I like to hear bab-"

"No no no, you got it all wrong, sweetie. I'm burying myself in the blankets and going to sleep. I'm so fucking exhausted."

"Oh."