What's so difficult about telling him my feelings? I can definitely do this.
And today is the day. Since it's our anniversary. It still sounds unbelievable that it's been two years already.
Truth to be told, I never liked the arranged marriage thing but in these two years I got to know Jisung well enough so I think I'm okay with this marriage.
More far than okay. It's not my fault he was nice to me. Even at times I started arguing for no reason he would be calm.
Calm means calm. He doesn’t talk much in general. Sometimes it feels like he is mute.
But I can never complain about that. He is sweet after all. He cares about others.
I just want him to know about my feelings for him. This sounds right. He should know.
I went home earlier than usual today. Not expecting anything special from him today but at least I can do something special.
I took out a small box from my bag and placed it on the nightstand.
Nothing much to do. I can only cook something he likes. After keeping the cheesecake in the refrigerator I went to cook.
_________
It was about time for Jisung to come home. My cooking was done almost too.
I heard the doorbell. I took off the apron and went to open the door with a bright smile.
He looked more tired than usual. But he returned the smile with a weak one.
His condition makes me wonder if I really should talk to him today or let him rest.
He made his way to the couch and sat there. He looked back at me. He paused before speaking
"Shall we talk?" he suggested. I'm here to talk.
I nodded. I don’t know what he wants to love. But it can't be bad. Talking with him is always something I look forward to.
I went where he was seated and sat beside him. He turned his face towards me. 2
"You will be happy after hearing that" Jisung announced. That made me excited.
"Really? What is it?" I asked with enthusiasm. There was a line of silence.
For some reason he doesn’t look like he knows how to speak.
He cleared his throat before saying something. "Our divorce papers are almost ready. Remember our parents said if we can't deal with each other for two years we can divorce. But we have to try at least two years"
As much as I wanted to think I didn’t hear right what he said I was that much sure I knew this is what he said.
"So….you want divorce?" My voice came out as a murmur. He nodded
"Isn't it what we both wanted from the beginning?" He made it sound as if I wanted that too.
"You can't deal with me?" I asked out of pure curiosity.
"It's not like that. You are nice and polite. But that's the best for us. I know how it feels to live with someone you don't love. I'm sure you probably felt uncomfortable too while sleeping in the same room as me."
"Did you inform your parents?" I asked. I have nothing else to ask now that I know he wants a divorce
He shook his head.
"I thought we should talk first," he said. "Hm" I got up from the couch.
Not even once he asked if I wanted this divorce. Does it look like to him I'm his girlfriend he can break up and make it up whenever he wants?
