✅ If I Decide To LEAVE YOU ~ [English Version ]

ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣- 1

If I Decide To LEAVE YOU ~
[YIZHAN- Wattpad]
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Hello! my name is Xiao Zhan, am 28 years old and am an Omega.

I have two beautiful children. My little five-year-old A-Yuan and my precious ten-year-old A-Ling.

I have been married for ten years to Darren Wang, an extremely handsome alpha who is coveted by anyone.

Our families are mutual friends and that made us bond even more when we were classmates in high school.

Although we had been together for months, on graduation night I had my first heat with him because the suppressants were inhibited due to excessive alcohol intake.

I thanked the heavens, that he was the one who was by my side. Otherwise my story would have been different.

A-Ling was the result of that night, we decided to get married to avoid what others will say, although that didn't matter much to me.

We loved each other very much and it had been my mistake not to control the amount of drink ingested, Otherwise my son would not have been born.

I'm not surprised that , he felt obligated to be my partner all these years because of that.

Our lives were just beginning and we were forced to land our flights suddenly.

Well, mainly I was the one who stayed in what we now call home , taking care of the puppies and housework while he works his father's company.

The first years were the most beautiful of my life. The stage of infatuation that according to scientists lasts about a year, for me it was almost five.

During falling in love, if other is not a person who we want him to be. We put on other
a veil, that covers it and not
we get to see it as it is in
reality. Not completely.

Thus, we are exacerbating their virtues and minimizing their defects, and sometimes we do not end up in love with that other, but with the one we thought he was, the one we wanted him to be, what we idealized.

Of course, this veil does not cover the other forever; hence the infatuation lasts only a year, sometimes two, It will be then when the veil falls and we can see the other as it is.

From then on, two paths will open: that of love (in the best of cases) or that of disenchantment (when the previous fantasy would have distorted reality too much).

I think that in my case the veil gradually began to fall after those wonderful five years.

In all infatuation we become a little obsessed, since we are aware of the other person in many ways, the truth is that sometimes the only thing that drives us to the other is the obsession to be reciprocated.

The idea that the other does not care about us, that he does not focus his attention on us, cannot be tolerated.

We feel badly wounded by narcissism itself, and it is our insecurity that leads us to despair, seeking the acceptance of that other with whom we have become obsessed.

It is in these cases, many times, it can become a drug that cannot be dispensed with.

We may rationally understand that it is a harmful relationship and that it is not convenient for us; but still we can't walk away and we go out of our way to maintain some kind of bond

What do we really need from him? What role does he occupy? What would our life be like without this person?

This last question is the one that has been on my mind for the last five years....

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𝕋𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕦𝕖𝕕......

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