On the Inside with Elizabeth Olsen

Comedy

Rearranging
It's like everything happened all at once

TW: Mentions of abuse/abusive relationship

Y/N POV

The last couple of hours have felt like a blur. As I've sat at my table, I've had a million different thoughts all at once.

Should I go back to school?

Do they even need me here?

I should call my mom. But should I, though?

Aww, that's a cute dog.

The longer I sit here, the more I feel Naomi and our memories returning. Fuck, my brain won't shut down. Oh, God, is my breathing getting quicker? Why is it so hot? My arms won't stop shaking. Please make this stop. Please...

Oh no.

"Come on, Y/N, you're really gonna sit there and make me the bad guy?"

I can feel my stomach shrinking. 

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming home! Do you have any idea how this makes me look?"

I guess I did catch her in the act. I should've texted her or let her come to me and explain things at her own pace. What an idiot.

"How many times do I have to say that I don't love you!?"  Naomi goes up to raise her arm-

That last memory pulls me out. I shoot up in a panicked state, making the shop around me grow quieter. I can't look anywhere else but at my own feet. I'm afraid I'll break down if I make eye contact with anyone.

"Y/N?" I hear Max call out from behind me.

I can't let her see me like this. Taking no extra time, I look up and bolt out the front door. My feet and mind aren't stopping, and before I know it, I find myself hunched over with my legs pushed against my chest, crying on some random park bench.

People pass by, giving me looks of concern or judgment, but no one stops to say or do anything about the annoying crying girl. To make matters worse, I can't stop whenever my body lets me catch a breath; it only lasts for less than a second. I swear I dry heave the last tears I have.

I don't know how much time has passed, but I can tell you how many happy families, couples, and kids have passed. To me, they are a constant reminder of the happiness I can't reach. To them, I probably look like a zombie. A result of my dehydration mixed with knowing that my tired eyes are most likely bloodshot. Shit, I need to get control over myself. This isn't the first time this has happened as of late, and I know it won't be the last.

"Fuck you for making me this way," I whisper to Naomi, wherever the fuck she is.

I slowly am bringing myself down, breathing in and out, running my hands through my hair, trying to gather myself together. Before feeling comfortable enough to leave, I take a minute to close my eyes and take in the cool spring air on my face. I can't rem-

"Excuse me?" A distant voice shouts out. Is someone talking to me?

"Hey, coffee shop girl!" The voice is closer.

Okay, well, that has to be for me. I open my eyes and look at who is calling to me. I give a confused look before realizing. Oh shit. It's that woman from this morning, Liz. And she's making her way over to me. Wait, why me?

"Hey!" I awkwardly half shout, letting the embarrassment wash over me. I go to stand up as she approaches the bench.

"Hey, no, please stay seated. I saw you as I was walking across the park." Liz smiles down at me. "May I sit?"