Imperial Love: Can't Help Falling In Love (Peters Story) Book Five

Chapter Fourteen

January 21st, 1944

Peter had trained harder than ever before, he had all of the support and recognition that he could get, and Gavin's words were encouraging him more than ever before. He didn't know if it was because Gavin wrote to him, or it was because people believed in him, but he was stronger than ever before and he had everything that he needed. Mike had also seen his improvement in such a short amount of time. He saw it with every rifle that he had shot, and he saw how he was holding it, and every bullet that he used in his training. Perhaps it was the thought of when all of this was over, he was going to return home to everyone that ever believed in him. Because he was more determined to survive than ever before.

That afternoon, during their breaks, Peter, Mike, Carl, and Harry all were sitting down. As Harry smoked a cigarette, he offered one to Peter and Mike but declined the offer, and gave one to Carl as well. As they were smoking their cigarettes, Mike started to ask Harry and Carl how they were feeling, seeing if they felt as if they were ready for this mission. 

Harry admitted that he was feeling uneasy, he was starting to feel discouraged, and he didn't know why. He had been working hard, and Carl and Peter noticed it too. Perhaps it was a confidence issue. Harry was around the same age as Peter, and Peter could tell if someone was having problems with their confidence and their self-esteem. It happened to Peter, and it took him a long time for him to finally feel sure of himself.  And Peter did want to help Harry feel more like himself.

As Harry lit up another cigarette, he smoked it and started to look around. Harry was nervously looking at Carl who had been holding his cigarette without smoking it for at least a few minutes. Peter looked over and saw that Harry was getting more and more anxious around Carl, maybe Carl was the reason he wasn't feeling too confident, given how blunt and how rude Carl usually was. And Peter wanted to put a stop to Carl's rudeness towards everyone. 

"Harry..." Peter said to him trying his best to be subtle and discreet, "How are you feeling?"

"Fine..." Harry said slightly confused and just staring at him, Harry then took a quick glance at Carl and then looked at Peter again, "Why?"

"You just seemed a little anxious today during training, I just don't know if..." Peter was starting to think about the next words that were coming out his mouth, especially because Carl was right there, "Never mind... Is there a bar around here somewhere?"

"There should be..." Mike answered, "Why? Do you want to get a drink?"

"Sure..." Harry answered

"A drink sounds nice..." Carl said chiming in trying to get into the conversation. Peter looked over at Carl after he made his comment and didn't say a word, it took him at least ten seconds to say what he was going to say.  But then Peter just decided that he wanted to be the bigger person, and just invite him for a drink. Because at the end of the day, he wanted to be civil with everyone, and Carl was no exception.

"You know it wouldn't hurt to really get to know you two." Carl said, "I want to know what got you on the ground rather than the air."

Mike looked over at Peter, who felt a little opposed to drinking with Carl, given the way he had treated everyone, including Harry who was one of his closest friends.  Carl just smirked at Peter, and Peter chose not to engage in any arguing until he felt it was necessary.  

Peter smiled at Carl, and Harry could immediately tell that it was a fake smile. And Peter walked off with Mike. Peter smiled at Carl, and Harry could immediately tell that it was a fake smile. And Peter walked off with Mike. And Mike could immediately tell that something was going to happen between Carl and Peter. He had a feeling there was going to at least be an argument or two. But Mike knew Peter had good control. And he was good at biting his tongue at the end of the day. He was more worried about Carl pushing his buttons. 

As they got to the bunks, Mike sat down next to Peter and Peter started breathing in and out very heavily. It was a load of stress and a sigh of relief all rolled into one. Mike looked at him and tried not to laugh, thinking about everything that was happening with Carl. Mike admitted that he was nervous about things happening. He was worried there was going to be a fight, or there was going to be someone finding out about the invasion on Rome that they were planning. 

There were loads and loads to think about. But Mike always was reasonable in any given situation, so if anything were to ever happen, Mike would try to talk everyone out of it. That's just who he was. Which was something that Peter loved about him. He just loved how he was always wanting to do the right thing, and Peter needed to work on that from time to time.

There was an awkward silence between Peter and Mike until Harry and Carl came walking in. And Peter decided to say something to Harry, but just a simple "Hello" to make things easy and that won't start an argument.

Peter looked over at Mike again, and saw the face that he was making, and he could recognize that face at a drop of a hat. It was Mike's crooked smile that gave it away, it was an awkward interaction between Carl and Harry and them.

Harry looked over at Peter and wanted to say something. But Peter had a bunch of other things on his mind, rather than Carl's constant harassment because he was about to go into an important mission. 

Peter wanted to write one more letter before capturing Rome, he wanted it to be to Ruby. He wanted to open up before he went out there, and risked his life for his country. He wanted to let Ruby know what was happening, and where he was going to end up, and he didn't know where he was going to end up next. Peter sighed, and his nerves were coming back, but he was more nervous than ever before. It was all because his fate was in the hands of the Italian Campaign and he needed to be stronger than ever. This was going to be a mission that would either make or break him. Mike reminded him that he was going to be more than alright because Peter was stronger than he thought he was, which Mike reminded Peter constantly.

But Peter just wanted to write to Ruby and let all of his emotions out before his fate got even more questionable. He wasn't one for opening up, so he had a hard time trying to figure out what he was going to write. He didn't know why, but a part of him was because he had a fear of rejection and a fear of feeling like he wasn't good enough.

He just started to write... but he couldn't get anything out except for "Dear Ruby," he didn't know why. He didn't know if it was because he was scared that he wasn't going to survive the next day. He let the stress get to him, and Carl, Harry, and Mike all saw the stress, fear, and anxiety all on his face. Peter's breathing heavily added to it, and he was getting scared for himself and was hoping that his brother was telling him the truth and that everything was alright between him and Delilah. He wanted everything to be alright when the war was over, he wanted his family to be safe and he wanted them to all have a good relationship. But he didn't know what was next, and he was terrified to see what was going to happen next.