My Section of Dysfunction

Chapter 5

We rush through the sliding hospital doors and dash to the first available elevator. Shockingly bright walls violate my eyes. The sterile, chemical clean scent makes my stomach turn. I grip Gabe's hand till my knuckles are white. If it hurts he doesn't say anything. I lock my focus on Gabe's profile, his distress exudes from him. "It will be okay." he muttered, his eyes fixed ahead. I couldn't tell if he was trying to convince me or himself.
Once we find her room through a maze of hallways, we are told to wait. "They're running test" they say. I turn my back to the wall and slowly sink down the scratchy surface to crumple into a ball of worrisome frustration. Gabr slides down beside me, placing a gentle arm across my shoulder. He finally turns his solicitous eyes to look at me. He raises a soft hand to my face to wipe away a tear I didn't know existed. "This may be a bad thing, but that doesn't mean good things will stop happening." he mumbled. In this moment I don't have a have a voice. My only response is the nudge of my head into his shoulder.
Minutes seem like an eternity. By the time the doctor approaches , I've zoned out into a flood of thoughts. His words snap me awake instantly. "Stage three liver cancer, hepatocellular carcinoma he declares. "I'm afraid it's terminal." A lump congeals in my throat as I chock back a sob,willing my self not to cry anymore. "How long does she have ?" I murmur, the words barely audible.
"Hard to say," he says, "but we're doing all we can. You can see her now."
I give a slow nod as Gabe helps me up. He puts an arm around my waist, holding my weight. He slowly leads me inside Aunt Kali's room.
Monitors beep in unison, multiple IVs hand from a pole. The only light in the room is a shallow, yellow ting hanging over head, stressing Aunt Kali's lifeless skin. Her eyes flutter towards us as we enter the room. Her voice is small and childlike as she speaks.
"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you." She says, her eyes locked on me.
"You knew ?", My words come out harsher than I expected. I try to conceal the rage pounding through my veins. I feel my face flood with heat. I clench my fist, my nails forming white half moons on my palms.
"H-how could you do this, how c-ould you lie about this." My voice barely squeaks as sobs close my throat.
"I'm sorry," Aunt Kali whispers as a tear trickles down her delicate cheek. "You're upset, I understand, but there's things we need to talk about." she says.
"What?" I ask,my voice shaking.
My answer comes from the opening of the bathroom door. A slim figure of a woman steps out. Her blonde hair is fixed in a tight pony tail. The same bags from the last time I saw her all those years ago form under the eyes we share.
A gasp escapes my lips as my mother offers a formal "Hello Faye."
I turn from the room, muttering a small "Excuse me." and I run. The walls jump forward as my vision swims. I run though my legs itch with a stinging pain. I run though my side throbs like it could break in half. I run though my lungs feel like they're engulfed in flames. I fight my way through the maze of hall ways until I feel the cold night air. I my legs buckle underneath me and I fall to the ground in a huff. I wrap my arms tightly around my sides, willing to hold myself together. Inhuman blubbery explodes from my mouth.
For the first time in 11 years I let my guard down. I let myself feel everything, pain and all.