My Section of Dysfunction

Chapter 12

The next morning, some plans changed. Around 9am the dull tone of my phone eased me awake. After a few rushed seconds of fumbling through blankets and a scrapbook, I locate my phone. The all too familiar number of the hospital flashes across my screen. Great, what's went wrong now?
I hesitantly answer.
"Hello?" I ask, my voice still thick with sleep.
"Hello, this is Doctor Morgan. Is this Faye?"
"Um, yes. Is something wrong?" I question, silently praying the answer was no.
"We'd like for you to come in. Something's come up and e want to discuss the next step." Doctor Morgan replied. He clearly wasn't going to answer my question.
"Yeah,sure," I said, "I'll be there in about 30 minutes.
"That will work. I'll meet you in the lobby." Doctor Morgan said quickly.
"Great." I said even though I knew whatever had come up was anything but.
"Goodbye." Doctor Morgan mumbled before the line went dead.
I quickly dialed Gabe's number as I stood up. I gently closed the scrapbook and placed it back on the shelve as I waited for him to answer. After the fourth ring he picked up.
"Faye? Are you okay?" He asked sounding slightly startled. Clearly we were in the same mindset.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Doctor Morgan wants to meet with me. He said things have come up. I highly doubt hat means anything good." I say, nervousness clearly evident in my voice.
"What time? Do you want me to pick you up?" Game asked, sounding concerned.
"About 10, and that'd be great but you don't have to. I know spending a day at the hospital isn't ideal." I say.
"The hospital may not be ideal, but spending the day with you is." He replies.
"Thanks." I utter as my lips pull into a smile. "See you then" I say
"Yeah, see you then." He replies.
I could be imagining things, but I think I heard a smile in his voice too.
~
By the time I'd taken a shower and changed clothes 30 minutes had passed. I grabbed a granola bar and my purse, then walked out the door. Gabe was waiting in the driveway his smile apparent through the windshield . I suddenly felt way too happy to be going to he hospital.
"Hey." I chirped as I climbed into the passenger seat of his truck.
"Hi." Gabe replied with a bright smile still on his face. "You look nice today."
"Thanks." I said. I turned to glance out the window as we pulled out of the driveway so he couldn't see the blush I could feel seeping through my cheeks.
"So," Gabe began, "What's your favorite movie?"
"The Breakfast Club,why?" I questioned.
"Just curious." Gabe replied. "Favorite food?"
"I'm pretty sure you know this one." I laughed thinking of all the times he'd taken me here.
"Hmm," Gabe pretended to ponder. He even stroked a nonexistent beard for effect.
"Well, I'd say chicken nuggets from Chick-fil-a with s fruit cup on the side." His smug smile showed that he knew he was correct.
"Annnnd?" I insisted.
"A s'mores frappe from Starbucks." Gabe added quickly.
"Correct." I giggled as he smiled at his achievement.
"Chick-fil-a is pretty good, I'll give you that." He grinned.
"Chick-fil-a is better than most life experiences! It's obviously better than your "world famous" lasagna." I mocked, using air quotes around world famous.
"Eat my shorts!" He belted, ending the phrase in a laugh. That was the only quote he could seem to remember from that movie.
Gabe looked over at me and it felt like he was a walking,talking sun. I couldn't be near him without feeling his warmth. And with that one look we both erupted into a fit of laughter.
~
Moments later we pulled into the hospital. We both became silent as the tension of reality washed over us. Without a word we both got out and walked inside.
Doctor Morgan was waiting for us when we walked inside. His eyebrows were knit together as he slowly paced back and forth. he came to a stop once he spotted us and came to meet us at the sliding entrance doors. Doctor Morgan ran a hand through his thick, dark hair. He releases a long, drawn out sigh once he stopped in front of us. He looks like a nervous child waiting for punishment. This can't be a good sign.
"Hello Doctor Morgan. Thanks for meeting with us." I stated.
"You're very welcome Faye. Well be discussing our options in one of our conference rooms, so if you'll follow me." Doctor Morgan replied with a gesture to the elevator door I front of us.
We all boarded the elevator and road the third floor in silence. Once we got off Doctor Morgan lead us to a large room with sickly lime green walls. The stench of hand sanitizer invades my nose. Nine blue rolling chairs were placed around a u-shaped table. Two of these chairs were occupied by middle aged women in lab coats. My mother say in a chair next to them. I wasn't happy about her joining us but what option did I have? I just want to get this over with without upsetting either one of us.
Gabe and I each take a seat across from Doctor Morgan. He sets his sympathetic eyes on us and clasps his hands together in front of him before he speaks.
"According to recent results, our current treatments aren't working as well as we had hoped. The cancer has continued to spread."
Doctor Morgan pauses to read our faces before he continues.
"At this point we feel like it's only possible to slow it down, if that."
My breath catches in my throat. Gabe reaches for my hand and I take it. His large hand engulfs mine and warms my cold fingers.
"So," I say, my voice quiet in the large room. "How are we going to do that?"
"Well, it's evident that the chemo isn't working. At this point it's probably doing more harm than good and-"
"What about a liver transplant?" I ask, interrupting Doctor Morgan.
"At this point a transplant wouldn't be wise." replies Doctor Morgan. "Getting a donor could take months and even if one was available there's a chance her body would reject the liver."
"Couldn't we just try it? We could wait until she's stronger." I say hopefully.
"Faye, being completely honest with you I don't think she's going to get much stronger." Doctor Morgan muttered. He looks so upset, so sorry that I almost want to hug him and tell him it'll be okay. He didn't like giving this news anymore than I wanted to hear it.
"So what are you suggesting? Are we just giving up?!" I quaked, my voice rising a bit.
"This is why I need to talk to everyone today. Kali left the decision up to you and your mother."
I gulped. Of course she did.
"Right now," Doctor Morgan continued. "Our options are limited. We could continue chemo but I feel that's not in her best interest."
"What is in her best interest?" I mutter though I was scared I already knew the answer.
"Can't we just let her rest?" Asked my mother, breaking her silence.
"That's where I was going next. At the moment I believe we should just try to make her comfortable. We could send her home." Replied Doctor Morgan.
"So we're giving up." I mumbled.
"Don't think about it like that Faye." Gabe whispered to me. "Chemo would just put her through more pain. Lets just make her comfortable and enjoy what time have."
I choke back tears as I say the hardest thing I've ever said.
"Okay"