Thantophobia

Chapter 1: Consequences

It was exactly 4:02 PM; school had let out only seven short minutes ago but I was already planted comfortably in my seat on the bus. The bus was parked along the school sidewalk, the engine buzzing impatiently as kids began to file onto the bus periodically. The bus was scheduled to pull off campus at 4:10, so until then, I was forced to stare outside the smudged and germ-sprinkled window at all the kids taking the sidewalk home.

I knew, though, that most of them weren't walking home. They were walking to the woods that lined the sidewalk to go smoke weed together - that's where everyone went to smoke weed before, during, and after school hours. Yes, during. This place has absolutely no security system whatsoever; students enter and leave freely without disruption from any of the faculty and staff. No one cares enough to stop them. 75% of the student population here is run by potheads, so even if the school administration wanted to make an effort to bust these kids, theoretically they didn't have that power.

I always wondered what it was like, though. What was it like to have no sense for consequences? What was it like knowing you wouldn't have a ride home if you didn't get on the bus, but choosing to stay on campus to smoke anyway? Do those kids ever even get home, or do they just sleep in the woods? I must be over analyzing. Of course they don't sleep in the woods, that's ridiculous.

My train of thought was broken when I heard my bus driver begin to converse with someone. That's strange. Miss Lee never talks, which I guess is weird in itself. I peaked over the top of the seat in front of me to see a hunched over boy with long straggly hair smiling brightly at Miss Lee.

"Good to see you again, boy," the old lady choked out. You see, when you get to a certain age, your voice gets so worn out and damaged from all the words you've spoken in your past life, that it begins to sound like you're choking whenever you speak. I think Miss Lee was at that turning point in her life. It must be heartbreaking to have to witness the pleasantness in your voice slowly slip away as you age. I couldn't even imagine.

But the boy's voice was much more refreshing. I was nearly relieved when I heard the young and healthy noise that he called his voice escape from his lips. It was much more enjoyable to listen to than Miss Lee's, and maybe my comparing the two voices is what made his sound so good. Or, maybe, his voice actually was lovely, and maybe I'm just over analyzing again.

"I'm glad to see you as well, Miss Lee. It's a strange thing to say that I'm glad I have returned," the boy replied. Returned? I had never noticed him before in the first place. When was he ever here? I noted that he was wearing a plain gray sweatshirt that molded nicely to his soft body type. He wasn't fit, but he wasn't fat. He was soft. Meaning, if I were to ever poke his stomach, it would most likely feel like jell-o. But his overall size was near average.

He was pale. Very pale. His lips were cracked and looking deadly, though the warm and embracing smile plastered to his face showed no sign of death. Everything about him was a contradiction. The way his dark eyes fooled you into thinking his whole persona was one big shadow. The grease that clung to the thick strands of his hair made you think he had given up on styling it, along with everything else. The way his clothes made him seem like a bum, and the way his walk made him seem like he was small.

In that moment that I studied him, he wasn't small. The brightness that was etched into his dark and misleading features was very loud. He had a loud personality, although I knew immediately that somehow the contradiction of his entire being made sense. I knew he wasn't just one type of person or the other. The fact that he made absolutely no sense to me was what made him an individual, and it's hard to wrap my brain around that. It's not every day you see people like this.

Unfortunately enough, due to my persistent (and probably rude) observing, I didn't pick up where he said he had "returned" from. But now he was done talking with Miss Lee, and he was eyeing the rows for an available seat. I watched him carefully as he chose the seat that appealed to him most, dropping himself onto it ungracefully.

"Good, Gerard?" Miss Lee checked on him. It almost made me cringe when I realized how much Miss Lee adored this "Gerard" kid. What made him special? I hate teachers' pets. I was hoping this kid wasn't one of those.

Gerard glanced at her through the mirror that was held directly above the bus driver's head, allowing her to see every student on the bus. He held an approving thumbs up at her, causing her to smile thoughtfully back at him before putting the bus into drive.

I glanced down at my phone, indicating that the time was 4:12. Damn it, Gerard. Putting us two minutes behind, and I didn't even notice until now. Seems like this kid has a way of charming everyone he meets, putting us all in an unrealistic enchantment. Well, of course, I haven't exactly met him. I've analyzed him though, which was close enough but still not exactly "it". I haven't met him yet, and that wasn't good enough for me.

Author Note: this chapter was short but it's basically just an introduction. Now you know the first time Frank saw Gerard. I'm really excited for this story, because as you may or may not have noticed, my writing has improved since I wrote Jamie and the beginning of Stain Glass Eyes. I'll still be writing Stain Glass Eyes, by the way, just kind of eh. I'm trying to set out for a story that is it's own story, whereas Stain Glass Eyes so far is probably the most unoriginal story out there hahaha. I feel like this one will be much different though and a lot more thorough since my way of writing is less childish now. I already have the plot in mind, but with Stain Glass Eyes I'm winging it lmao. Anyway. I hope you enjoy the many chapters to come.