The Love In Our Lungs

Chapter 20

I stood at the foot of Tyler's bed, with the hope that with a sedulous mind and thoughts of happiness we could conquer the doubt and apprehension towards ourselves through time. His sleeping figure would be no more once I got my hands on a wet towel I used to cover his face. He groaned and opened one of his eyes that managed to survive the assault of the towel and go out into the light. I smiled once he closed his eyes again.

"What?" he mumbled, and I laughed when he threw the towel at my face, and wrapped himself in the blanket, making his body look like a worm. An idea popped into my mind and for a few seconds, I remained silent, just to get his attention through the absence of sound, making it look as if my presence had left the room.

"Okay, now move towards your target like the worm you are," his head immediately turned away from the window and looked at me standing near the door of his room, my body leaning against it. A confused look then made its way onto his way and he tilted his head to the right while squinting his eyes.

"Imagine I'm a leaf... food;" he seems a bit motivated now to get up, "come at me," I made a motion with my hand as if to clarify my need and want to get him out of bed even more. I prosecuted my staring at his form, while he slowly laid down from the bed and onto the floor.

For a second I got scared since he'd just hit the floor pretty hard, but as soon as that happened he was back up. Was it because he was used to it already? Or was the pain already subsiding to the point where he didn't see it as something worth reacting to? Maybe his body was fond of the idea of being tough just as much as he liked it.

It wasn't something and it never has been meant for vulnerability to be seen as weak. Though it has often correlated itself with a consequence, it is one. Weak and vulnerable being seen as synonyms of each other sure can make sense but in certain circumstances.

A consequence and torture mechanism are known to the brain and its emotions. Tyler sure was a constant victim of this, but not only him but us as well, those who were affected by the fast mist around him, later losing not only him in the path but his parents and myself as well. Blindness was the next step towards life being truly weak, without the vulnerability present and just a wall of false emotions covering the weakness within.

You'd eventually fool others while fooling yourself further into the lie you've told, now believing it as your truth. It becoming the topic of interest in persuasive argument.

Down in the kitchen, Tyler's father and I had been washing the dishes while Tyler and his mother were back up in his room just after we had all finished the delicious breakfast served. They had been there with the purpose of reorganizing Tyler's many bags of clothes. The water ran through the plates and cups, and even though the sound of matter collided with the liquid, the sound of their voices was audible to us.

"Do you think he'll get better?" I asked Peter once I had finished my portion of the dishes and waited for him as he still washed some more utensils left from last night's meal. Sitting on one of the stools in the kitchen, I waited for his answer.

"I believe that he's already gotten better to an insane level from what he was like two years ago," he paused as he set the cups in a cabinet, "I also believe that you have gotten better as well," we'd both had an influence on each other ever since that bump back at school.

Everyone is multiple people at the same time, and I'm not only talking about those that do indeed have multiple personalities that they consider another person. The fact that there is no completely true version of yourselves that others see. Only to oneself, there can be a true version and that is only shared with the brain.

To set an example for this philosophical thought, I had left Tyler's house and left behind a version of myself with the three people in the household. All of which had chosen how and who they would see me as, something that wasn't in my hands but in theirs as well as the beliefs set out for them to compromise. Of course, their perspective of me wasn't the same as my mother's or Stella's. Which created an infinite amount of perspectives and people that went by my name, all that looked exactly like me, but wandered around in the forest of minds that belonged to the people I've met.