FINE LINE

Save Your Tears

Diamonté's POV

A tap on my shoulder pulls me out of my slumber. Slowly opening my eyes I find Kayda standing over me with a huge grin on her face.

" Wakey wakey sunshine," she grins.

I turn on my side with my back facing her to continue my rest. A slap to ass wakes me up fully. I sit up in my bed angrily looking at her.

" Wah dat fah Bredda?" I croak rubbing my eyes.

" Time to wake up ma'am and your breakfast is waiting."

" Should have just lead with that," I fake smile getting out of the bed.

I make my way to my bathroom and did my morning tinkle, wash my face and brush my teeth. I then made my way downstairs.

I enter the kitchen to see Valencia over the stove making pancakes and a breakfast spread on the island. There is pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausages, oatmeal and orange juice layed out.

I take a seat on one of the stools resting one of my elbows on the island with my jaw in my hand staring at nothing in particular.

" Good morning my love," val smiles making me a plate.

Well she's in a rather chipper mood.

" Well today's the big day how are you feeling?" she continues.

I advert my eyes to her giving her a small smile and a thumps up.

" Fix your face love, as a matter of fact eat this you'll feel better," she says placing the plate before me.

" Good Morning My Neighbours!" Sterling exclaims dancing his way into the kitchen.

No mon but why everybody suh excited today.

I dig into the food eating all that I can manage.

" Why she look suh depressed?" Sterling asks pointing at me.

I don't know what has happened but my mood has been low today. This is not like me at all. Maybe I shouldn't go. I could call Giannis up right now and make something up, hopefully he'll understand.

" I don't think I should go," I hurridly say to them.

It's like we're playing mannequin challenge because everyone froze looking at me.

" Aww baby your nervous," val hugs me from behind.

" ARE YOU MAD?....... I've invested too much into this for you to flunk out," Kayda expresses.

" Cyah do that to di man bad bro," Sterling shakes his head.

" How long has it been since you've done anything or been with anyone," Kayda asks concerned.

" A bit over a year," I answer softly.

After my extremely horrendous breakup it took me a while to talk to anyone much less to be in bed with them. I however had a friend's with benefits relationship with a college mate of mine. We didn't see ourselves commiting to anyone at the time so that's the type of relationship we maintained. I asked for our agreement to end over a year ago because I knew I'd be coming back to Jamaica and I didn't want to wait on the appointed time. I needed time to get him out of my system and be accustomed to being by myself. Even though we didn't share a lot of personal details with each other I enjoyed our bond and enjoyed what we had together while it lasted.

I sigh to myself feeling conflicted. Should I go? Or should I not? I don't know if I'm making the right decision. My friends all seem to agree so I guess they're right. Honestly I don't know.