blank open eyes | reiner braun x reader

chapter eleven

The transformation to the Armored Titan left a heap of rubble behind as the enemy base crumbled brick by brick. Demolished to the very foundations, smoke dulled the starless night.

Reiner didn't know if there were any survivors, and, as he tucked you gently into the titan's hand, desperate to get back to the airship, he couldn't have cared less. Nothing mattered if you didn't make it back to Marley alive. Not the carnage or the mission.

Even if your operation was successful, he doubted they could win the rest of the war without you.

That was why when you'd left him with a choice, to abandon you or leave a pile of bodies in his wake, his decision had been made immediately. There would be insurmountable damage, he'd known that, but he also knew there was no way in hell that he'd leave you behind.

Regardless, the ever-present, steady thump of guilt knocked into his chest, attempting to claw its way into his mind. Reiner was unable to turn around and face the destruction he'd caused, once more in his life refusing to acknowledge the number of lives he'd stolen.

In the moment, all he could think about was you. He was running on a one-track mind, a steady rhythm of one foot in front of the other. As far as he was concerned, the only task was to get you back to the ship and get you the medical attention you needed. The rest of the world could burn if it had to, until you were healed.

Only then, when you were stabilized, breathing at a steady rate without blood draining from you profusely, would he let himself feel remorse for his actions.

Still, an ill churning settled in his gut, a reminder that all of this could've been prevented. It was easy to blame himself for the deaths of enemies, but even easier to fault himself for your injuries. He should've been paying attention, should've been faster, and maybe, you wouldn't have gotten hurt at all.

He should've been watching out for you instead of turning his back like he swore he wouldn't.

In the palm that he cradled against his shoulder, you tried desperately to stay conscious, muttering nonsense under your breath. Reiner couldn't understand most of it; you were in and out of it and that made him run just a little faster. The moist soil was concave under the weight of his titan.

Any breath could be your last and that was what scared him the most. Not even the most complex statistical math in the world could help him predict which one it would be.

There was, it seemed, only one silver lining in the unfortunate outcome: Destroying the mission had bought you all time. If there were any survivors, they would call in reinforcements rather than chase after your unit with limited numbers. Your escape seemed inevitable, so long as you weren't spotted in flight by enemy aircrafts before you could cross countries.

The entire situation sent a throbbing headache through both of Reiner's temples. He just wanted to be back home, safe and sound. Reiner would even settle for being in one of those dull debriefing meetings if it meant being out of this gruesome situation.

Yet, no matter how quick his movements were, he couldn't compete with the speed of time. Seconds felt like hours and minutes like days. The distance to the airship seemed twice as long, even with Reiner sprinting in a form that was meters taller than he'd been before. With everything at stake, every fraction of a moment counted, and he was afraid to waste them.

Finally, a familiar face came into sight. Pieck's dark hair billowed in the wind as she stood at the edge of the forest, watching for any sign of trouble.

As relieved as Reiner was to see the fellow Warrior, the mere glimpse of her sent a swell of revolting nausea down his throat. He realized he was about to hand-deliver your dying body to her. To patient and intelligent Pieck who cared deeply for you and the rest of her friends. Who had been close with you long before he returned from Paradis. Whose family gladly accepted you as another member.