The Wings Of A Caged Bird | First Draft

chapter 56: no second chances

16 August, 2019

When I wake up to the sound of the alarm, only a single thought strikes my mind.

From the day after tomorrow, July won't be in my life anymore.

The thought is so crushing that I lose all my strength of getting up, and just lie there on the bed for a long time like a lifeless rag doll. When I turn behind me, I see July leaning against the headboard, his head hanging to the side, fast asleep.

I slowly sit up, tap his cheek in a light way, and call, "July. Hey."

"Hmm?" He frowns but doesn't open his eyes.

"Lie down. Come."

Now he opens them only a little, and I help him move to the pillow and lie down comfortably. I pull the blanket away from him. Within a few seconds, he slips back into slumber.

I wrap the blanket around myself and watch him. I see him occassionally moving his mouth in his sleep, as if he's chewing on something. His lashes flutter once in a while. Is he seeing a dream? What if he's seeing Dawn again?

I shake the thought away. I'm sure that the connection between him and Dawn, as well as Dawn and I, both ended with the fulfillment of the wish. Now, nothing else remains but July.

So I watch him. I watch and watch, until rays of sunlight begin to pour into the room, embroidered by the shades of leaves outside the window. It's a privilege to watch someone you love sleep in peace, something I learned with Dawn. I wonder rif Dawn, too, chose sleep as the reward for fulfilling the wish of brother Aster's past boyfriend.

A long time passes before July finally moves a little. He groans as he changes position and stretches his arms. Then he blinks his eyes open, and his gaze lands on me.

He frowns, then lets out a gasp. "Were you masturbating while watching me?"

I sigh, not even surprised. "That's the first thing you choose to say after waking up in the morning?"

Laughter bubbles in his lips. He props himself up to a sitting position. "That's how I am, sweetheart."

I smile and look down. "That's how you are."

"Hmm? Why do you sound so sad?"

"It's nothing." I unwrap the blanket. "Let's go down. The diner's probably open by now."

"Will Autumn be there today too?"

"Why, are you jealous?"

"No, I just want to sit alone with you."

I squint at him.

"Okay maybe a liiiittle bit." He shows the amount with his thumb and forefinger, which are almost touching.

"That's so illogical, July."

He smiles. "I know right? I lose all my logic when I am with you."

                      ---------------------

July points at the word “Sex” and says, "They included this as well." He giggles.

I roll my eyes. Of course he will notice that first, out of the thousands.

Taking a few steps back, I move my eyes all over the massive mural, a rush of utter fascination rising within me.

Right now, we have come to the next and final destination of our trip to Greenwoods: The Mural Of Reasons To Live.

We took a local bus to this place right after breakfast. It was only two hours away. Considered one of the greatest artistic attractions of this country, this mural was painted against the back wall of what used to be a boarding school, but is now a book cafe. The height of the wall is only nine feet, but the width is much longer, covering a large area.