gym class - billie eilish

17

tw: drug addiction.

during our drive home my mind was filled with questions. is billie a drug addict? where's the money from? is she selling drugs?. but billie told me no more questions, and i was scared to find out what would happen if i did ask any more questions so i stayed quiet.

"what's on your mind baby?" billie's voice broke the silence. "more questions.." i said quietly. she sighed and said "ask me and i might answer them". "so.. are you a drug addict?" i asked, worried. "yeah i guess you can call it that.." she answered and my heart started pounding in my chest. "can you pull over?" i asked her with tears in my eyes as i felt my stomach turn. "my love, don't leave me.." she said and looked at me for a brief moment.

"gonna- throw up-" i said and billie immediately pulled over. i opened the door and got out of the car and threw up. when i finished i got back in the car and billie handed me a pack of kleenex to wipe my tears and blow my nose. "i'm sorry billie.." i said and started crying. "shh.. baby. it's okay. don't worry." she said and comforted me. i sighed and said "you can keep driving, i'm fine" as my mood switched from anxious and sad to anxious and numb. "can i have a pill? i'm really anxious" i asked billie. "no, you're gonna get addicted like i did" she said and kept driving.

when we got to my house, billie grabbed her bag and ran to the bathroom. i ran after her and managed to go into the bathroom with her. "what the fuck?" she yelled at me. "what the fuck are you doing? gonna take more pills?" i yelled at her back. "so what if i'm gonna take more pills? it's none of your damn business" she yelled back at me. i grabbed her bag and ran away. i didn't know where to run and i knew she was faster than me but i ran out of the front door and outside.

i hid behind a tree and felt my stomach turn again. my anxiety was high. i couldn't make any noise though or billie would find me. so i snooped through her bag and looked for the lowest dosage pill. i took it and sat down behind the tree. i heard footsteps approaching me and billie's breath. i couldn't run though. i had no more energy in my body. so i covered myself with my arms and waited for her to come around the tree and find me.

"y/n, what the fuck was that?" she yelled at me but somehow she remained calm. "i'm sorry, i don't want you doing this. you're not you when you're high." i said and started crying. she sat down next to me, hugged me, and said "you're right, i'm sorry. let's go back to your house tho". during our walk back home i could feel my anxiety calming down. the pill was working. i finally felt at peace.

when we got home i laid down on the bed and billie laid down next to me. i closed my eyes and felt safe and calm. i wanted to feel like this every day for the rest of my life. so, i pretended to be asleep until billie fell asleep. then, i got up and snooped through her bag to find the rest of the low-dosage pills. i hid them in my bra drawer since billie never looks there for stuff when i ask her.

billie rolled over in her sleep and a pill fell out of her pocket. i grabbed that pill and held onto it, contemplating if i should take it or not. i ended up not taking it and hid it with the rest of the pills i took. billie woke up after a bit and searched in her pockets. "fuck.. where is it?" she said, still half asleep. "where's what baby?" i asked her. "i had a pill in my pocket. now it's gone. do you know where it is?" she asked me.

i decided to prank her, and said "oh yeah it fell out of your pocket, so i took it.". she got really mad and started yelling at me "fuck y/n. this was a good pill. like a really fucking good one. and you just wasted it like that?? i wanted that shit. fuck.". "wait billie i didn't actually take it.." i said and started crying. "where the fuck is it then?" she yelled at me. "i'll go get it" i said and got up. i opened the drawer and grabbed the pill from it and gave it to billie.

"thank you baby, i love you" she said calmly and took the pill. "i love you too.." i said, still crying and scared for my life. she pulled me into a hug and kissed the top of my head. "i didn't mean to yell at you, i'm sorry." she apologized. "it's okay.." i said and fell asleep in her arms.

854 words, i hope you enjoyed it. i'm really sorry for not updating.

a/n: fixed grammar mistakes.