mad at myself (rhink)

when you're gone

I have no idea how to spend my time. Maybe Facebook? Maybe Tumblr? Maybe YouTube? Yes, I'm going to watch some videos on YouTube. That's a good idea!

I get my laptop from my desk and lie down in bed and turned it on.

"Maybe some cat fails will cheer me up", I mumble in myself while looking through a list of popular videos.

Then I see it. A video called: I Miss You. It's uploaded on Links and mine channel. I click on it.

Link is sitting on a stool. His eyes are red and it looks like he doesn't take care of himself that much. Music starts playing.

I remember me playing that, it's from a song we wrote but never used for anything. I feel tears welling up in my eyes.

Link starts singing.

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it okay
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
They lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah, yeah

And all I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
All the words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you

The tears stream down my face and I can't stop them. I'm not trying to either.

The song he sang is not the song we wrote together. He changed the lyrics and it's beautiful. Now I know that Link misses me and that he doesn't hate me.

I miss Link so much right now. I just need to feel his arms around me, his soft skin against me, his scent close to me. I need Link.

I wake up to the sunlight shining in my eyes. I blink a few times. My laptop is lying next to me, I probably fell asleep with my laptop on my lap. The memories from last night suddenly come back and they hit in the face with a baseball bat. Well not really, but it feels like it.

I need to fix everything I had with Link. Today I'm going to his house and fix everything!

Age 17

"Hi Rhett! Meet Emma." Next to Link is a hot cheerleader. She has long blond hair and wears way to much make-up.

"Hi Emma. Nice to meet you. I'm Rhett." I say politely.

I already what's going to happen with this relationship. Just like every one of Links relationships he dates a hot girl and then she dumps him for a taller boy. It happens all the time but Link is still trying to get in a real relationship with a girl.

I'm right, again. It's a few weeks later and Link is crying into my shoulder. I let him. I kind of feel bad for him, but I still think it's his own fault. I'm not going to tell him that.

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