Beauty and The Beast - A Bboing Fanfic

The Rain

~Beauty~

I was sitting in my living room, confused and worried. He was still in my room and to be honest, I felt as if I had made a big mistake. Whatever happened between us was unexplainable. I doubted myself for being jealous earlier, but why was I so jealous? Why did it bother me so much that I ended up picking a fight with him? Why did he kiss me? Why did I kiss him back? All these questions were storming my mind.

My head started aching with the dilemma I was in. It was tough for me to accept the fact that I had started liking him. It was more than a crush or infatuation. But how could I like another man when I was engaged to someone? 

I heard the door of my room open and I got alerted. I didn't know what he would say or do once he was out. But when he showed up in the light, he looked normal. I kept watching him intently as he walked to the couch and sat next to me. 

"Are you okay?" I asked hesitantly. It was weird since we had done something indecent a while ago. 

"Hmm, I'm okay now," he said in a low voice stealing glances at me. 

I got him some water while he chose to remain quiet. There was an awkward silence in the air and none of us were speaking. I didn't want to pressurize him to speak.

"I have trouble regulating my emotions," he finally spoke.

I looked at him with a frown since I didn't understand what he meant. He seemed to be a bit hesitant in telling me. 

"Can you be more specific?" I asked. 

"Umm," he said gulping in. "I can't handle extreme emotions like sadness, excitement, happiness, anger, or love," 

"What happens to you exactly?" I tried to clarify.

"My feelings get out of my control and reach an extreme which could be dangerous," he explained.

"So... does it happen due to the rain?" 

"It's severe for sometime after it rains but it's always there more or less," he said with a disappointed look. 

"But didn't you say you become emotionless during that time?" I asked.

He took a deep breath as if he was trying to overcome his impulses.

"What do you tell a man who can't control his drinking habit? You tell him not to drink, right?" He said.

I thought about it for a while and slowly started to understand. 

"So, your extreme emotions get severely triggered after it rains, that is why you have trained yourself not to have any kind of feelings at all. Right?" I asked. 

"Yes," he nodded. "I got rid of all emotions so that it was easier for me to handle rainy days," he continued, "Slowly, being emotionless became a part of my life," he faked a smile. 

"What happens otherwise?" I asked. 

"You saw what happened that night with Ji Hun? I was about to kill him because I was so angry that he tried to harm you," he said with embarrassment. 

He was right and I had seen him that night. He looked like a real beast who didn't care about anything. I could imagine why he tried to keep himself away from such feelings. But it was sad that he had become like that because of his condition. There must have been a way out of that problem but he was still struggling with it every day.