Hidden behind the mask

Punishment

Every time he got angry,
possessed,
even psychotic.
He'd clasp out his treasured weapon;
the coaxial cord.
He'd straighten the cord,
trialed out his own strength,
then...
smack time!
Punish time!

He sauntered towards me,
then firmly said "hands out",
I freaked out.

"Hands out",
I looked up at his face.

"Hands out!",
hands shivering behind my back.

"HANDS OUT!!, NOW!! TEN HITS!!!"
with such anger and intimidation.
I had my hands out side by side,
the fear in my heart,
heart pounding,
heart accelerating at high speed,
watching the coaxial cord coming down,
as the hard whip landed on my hands,
tears came rolling down my eyes...
"Damn it! Tears" (in my mind),
I couldn't hold it in...
tears had to come dripping down my soft cheeks.

"DON'T CRY!",
I quickly wiped my tears with my head down.

"HANDS OUT!",
I didn't want to but I had no choice.

Came another whip,
tears came rolling down my face.

"STOP CRYING!" ... "ACTUALLY START OVER AGAIN!",
the fearful look on my face,
I begged to continue not restart.

"Then stop crying!",
I had to try my best to not lay another tear.

"OUCH!",
I looked down to see how red my hands were.
Rubbing them on my lap in tears and pain.

"DO NOT MAKE A SOUND, WANT TO RESTART?!"

"No...no...",
As I sobbed in pain,
I took a deep breath and tried my best to not cry and make a sound.
I couldn't help it due to the pain.

"YOU WANNA CRY, YOU CAN CRY! THAT'LL BE ANOTHER TEN ONTOP NOW"

"NOOOOO!!...",
As I screamed in tears,
I sobbed my heart out,
I knew I couldn't handle the pain.
My hands were getting more red each time,
even had a mark of the cord on both my hands.
I was so worried about the remaining whips,
now ten more added on.
He looked like he was enjoying the smack,
whilst watching me suffer in pain.
He showed no mercy nor remorse.
"PLEASE NO MORE...",
As I begged and cried for mercy.

"Hands!!",
I had my red hands out.
He used maximum strength...
I watched the cord land on my hands.
I cried aloud as I couldn't hold it.
I had my hands together begging for mercy,
as I was wiping my tears.

"NO MORE DADDY!! PLEASE NO MORE!! IT HURTS",
I screamed so loudly in tears,
I had my hands back together,
looking at his face,
begging for mercy.
I was so scared,
he didn't care
how much he really had hurt me.
He whipped harder each time I cried,
the louder I cried,
the harder he'd hit,
until the end.

I always ended up with sore hands,
red hands,
bruised looking hands,
numb hands,
sometimes I couldn't feel them for hours.

~ deep thought girl writes

I'd like to apologise for anyone who's gone through or going through this.
Some parent or parents are psychotic, they'll hit you regardless of whether you've made mistakes or none at all. They'll abuse you according to how they feel. They don't discipline or guide you in ways to support you through your development.
Growing up can be tough, during a punishment or their psychotic moment, you're not allowed to make a sound or even cry or else they'll add up more whips.
It's even more challenging not to cry especially when they're using all their entire strength and going ham on you, you will cry and beg for mercy. If they are crazy enough to feel sorry for you they'll stop or the hits keep going until the remainder of hits end.
You'll have to train yourself to be a robot and go through all the whips, otherwise the more you cry and sob and make sounds, the hits will get a lot harder.