Navia And Destiny

Reason

"Grandma," she let out through her tears.

"Tension was sensed. Lots of it. What happened? Where's your sister?"

Navia wiped her nose with the long sleeve of her shirt.
"She ran off."

Grandma Lucy furrowed her brows. "She seems like too much of smart kid to run off to nowhere. What happened?"

Navia swallowed every bit of pain that made her feel like it was her fault in any way.

"She found out she was adopted."

"You told her here? Now? I hate to say it but that was terrible timing sweetpea."

"I didn't tell her anything. We had an argument and she followed me here to talk it out and she found the memory of us adopting her and she got upset and ran off. I told her not to follow me."

She watched her grandmother's eyes fill up with uncertainty.
"Are you saying it's your sister's fault that she found out?"

"You're taking her side?"

"No. No. Don't get me wrong. There aren't any sides here so I don't see how you could even find a way to create them."

Navia sighed and sat down on the floor.
With a wry smile, Grandma Lucy sat down next to her.

"Can I tell you a story?"

She waited for a response.

Navia nodded.

"Raising your mother and her brothers became so...complicated when their father died. It felt as though a whole new responsibility was thrown at me and caught me off guard. I was so...I was so angry with myself for feeling like a failure of a parent because I knew I couldn't fill up the void their father left. I became so bitter and distant that I left a void of my own."

She stared at her feet for a bit, trying to process what she was thinking and saying.

"And I tell you, there is no feeling worse than being nothing but an image. You feel like you don't know how or where to start in regaining consciousness. Regaining a slot in someone's life.
Then one Sunday at church, there was a mother's day special and youths were asked to stand and tell the church what they loved the most about their mums. The pastor came to up to Jennifer and she hesitates. He asks her again and she goes,"she risked her life to have me. I wouldn't be here without her." Okay. "Jesse what about you?" "Oh...she gives us everything we need to get by." "Will?" "Oh uh...my siblings got all the answers."

After taking a quick look at Navia to see if she was listening, which she was, she continued.

"One thing that most parents miss is that kids don't ask to be born. They're brought on this Earth by decisions we make. They aren't obliged to love us. It's up to us to give them reasons to do so. My mum gave birth to me and my dad buys me food and gives me shelter are not valid reasons to love them. At all. That's what we're supposed to do. There's never been anything special about that. Do they cheer you up? Do they make time to talk to you whenever you're at your worst? Do they make you feel safe? Find that out.
Ain't nobody born with hate. Ain't nobody born with love either. It's all taught and learned."

"So...what'd you do?" Navia asked under her breath.

"I started to raised them with reason. Reason to keep going. Reason to love. Reason love me just as much as I loved them. Now listen Navia, have you ever given your sister any reason to say she loves you? Any valid reason?"

Navia bit her bottom lip.

She wasn't sure if she'd ever even given an invalid reason.

"What do I do?"

"Aww sweetpea, I think you know the answer to that."

Navia took a break from staring at her feet.
They weren't anything new.

"I think I"-

But once again, she was met by nothing but the room full of reminders of who she had grown to be.