A Train Attack?!/Here we Go Again!

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Alphonse: Humankind can not gain anything without first giving up something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That's alchemy's law of Equivalent Exchange. 

At a nearby train station... 

Jack: Why did you have to bring me into this? 

(Y/N): Well, I was originally going to take Team Natsu, but well, they're busy. 

Back at New Tokyo... 

We see the team kicking bad guy butt! 

Natsu: AW YEAH!! IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I PUNCHED SOMETHING!!! FIRE DRAGON IRON FIST!!

He ends up bringing down a shop. 

Shopkeeper: MY CABBAGES!!!!

Natsu: Sorry! 

Shopkeeper: EVERY SINGLE TIME!!! 

Erza: Natsu, you're going to have to rebuild that. 

Natsu: Yeah yeah, I know. 

Back with you guys... 

Jack: But can you explain to me, why we have to end up with the one person with the worst trigger temper? 

Yep, it was Ed and Al. 

Ed: Hey, you guys aren't the ones who were ordered by that pompous smug idiot! 

(Y/N): Watch your mouth Ed, Mustang may be an egotistical idiot, but he's still your boss. 

Ed: YEAH!! THAT'S WHY I'M SO ANGRY!!!

Jack: More importantly- 

???: NOW FRIENDS, WE MUST GET ALONG!!!

Jack: Why do we have to go with the freaking hunk of muscle? 

(Y/N): Orders. Besides, having the Major around is kind of nice. 

Alphonse: I for one, think it's better than having to keep looking for the Philosopher's Stone. 

Ed: Yeah, well I want to break something if we don't get off this train sooner than later! 

Alex: Something wrong Edward Elric? You have no sense of patience. Heissgart is just a stone throw away. 

Alphonse: That sure brings back memories, huh Brother? 

Ed: Actually, now that you mention it. 

Jack: You've been there before? 

(Y/N): These two go everywhere. I'm expected to believe Ed did something bad and they- 

Ed: HEY SHUT UP!!!

Alphonse: Our mentor brought us there when we were still learning. 

(Y/N): Oh boy, so Izumi does exist in this universe. (gulp) If I meet her, I'm going to be a little nervous. 

You still remember how strong and deadly Izumi was. But did she do Human Transmutation before? 

Ed: It was by this guy called Wilhelm, he's an alchemist as skilled as our Teacher. 

Alphonse: If I remember, didn't he have a daughter? 

Ed: Yeah, I think so. She was skilled as an adult, despite being around our age. 

Jack: She was probably taller than you too. 

Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK?! 

As Ed started ranting, Alex smirked. 

Alex: Is that so? Well, she must be as strong as my sister. 

Ed: You kidding me? We were nice to her the whole time! And then she didn't even say goodbye when we left!

Alex: She probably didn't have the strength to say goodbye. OH HOW TRAGIC!! 

He was beginning to weep. 

But then a tremor is heard!

Jack: What was that? 

A voice is heard on the speakers! 

???: We are the Eastern Revolution Front. We have assumed control of this train. 

As they continued to talk, you guys were discussing matters. 

Alphonse: Wait, Eastern Revolution Front? 

Alex: I certainly never heard of them. 

Ed: It's probably just another radical group. What's this world coming to? 

(Y/N): Shouldn't we do something about it? 

Ed: Why do I have to? 

(Y/N): I could report this to- 

Ed: OKAY SHEESH!!!

Alex: THAT'S THE SPIRIT EDWARD ELRIC!!! 

He begins to throw his shirt off and flex. 

Alex: LET US GO AND PROTECT THE PEOPLE!! 

Two thugs then came in. 

Thug 1: Hey, didn't you hear? The Train is under the control of the Eastern Liberation Federation! 

Jack: Did they just change their name? 

(Y/N): More importantly, didn't you two deal with this before? 

Alphonse: Yeah, back then. 

Ed: Someone must have placed a curse on us. 

Thug 2: Hey Shorty, who gave you permission to chat? Shut up and fork over the valuables. 

Ed began to twitch. 

Ed: What did you call me? 

Thug 1: He called you a Shorty. 

Ed: Say that again. 

Thug 1: Oh did you not hear? Or maybe it's that you're hard of hearing, but you're a Sh- 

Ed: ARE YOU CALLING ME THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS KIND OF SHORTY?! 

Ed transmutes a massive mallet and sends the guy flying out of the train, Team Rocket Style! 

Thug 2: HE'S A STATE ALCHEMIST?! 

But then he sees Alex punch the ground as a punch of fists comes out and punch him into the wall. 

Alex: How pitiful. 

Alphonse: Who are these people? 

(Y/N): I don't know. But we got work to do! Al, can you fight? 

Alphonse: Well, let's just say Brother never beat me in a fight. 

(Y/N): GREAT! 

Ed: No need to act so smug. Hey Major, do you think you can- 

Alex: Leave it to me boys! 

He begins taking off in the opposite direction. 

Jack: TIME TO KICK SOME ASS!!!

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