Bite for Bite

The Crush Part 2

The past few days have been filled with research, intense training, and supportive coaching. You didn't think a man like Dirk would understand the ins and outs of young love but he had a suspicious amount of knowledge on the subject.

"Hey Dirk?" you ask looking up from the WikiHow you were reading on how to flirt.

He stops reading the book in front of him, and closes it, giving you his full attention.

"How do you know so much about how young people socialize and talk? I mean no offense but you definitely aren't in your twenties."

Dirk chuckles lightly and looks down at his hands before answering.

"Well I know a lot about learning how to love yourself, and I'm applying that here," he explains. "Self-love isn't easy, and neither is putting yourself out there. What I'm trying to teach you is to be confident in yourself. Being secure in your identity will help you foster fruitful relationships, be it romantic or platonic."

You gaze at the slightly balding man in awe. His age showed up physically and also in his sage advice.

Dirk seemed a bit uncomfortable in your silence. He cleared his throat and said, "So, find anything interesting?"

Breaking out of your trance you shake your head in reply.

"What about we try applying a new skill to the situation? I'm thinking of one called DEAR MAN."

"What makes you think the person I like is a man?" you exclaimed, offended.

Again Dirk laughs at your words. It takes him a minute to calm himself down. It seems as though you are really funny to Mr. Dirk.

He contains himself and responds to your accusation, "Y/n, DEAR MAN is an acronym. It doesn't apply to just men, thankfully. It communicates a boundary or gets what you want out of a conversation."

"So it's a fancy term for manipulation?" you say with deep concern. You thought Dirk was a positive influence on you, but now you were questioning that.

Yet again, Dirk laughs at you. "No no no," he gets out between giggles, "It's more about being effective in communication."

"Oh," you say, relaxing. You hadn't realized that your brow was furrowed and your muscles were tense from the stress of questioning Dirk's intentions.

"Now that that's cleared up," Dirk drawls "There are several components to DEAR MAN, but I think using only a couple will be the simplest and most efficient way to talk to your crush."

"Should I be taking notes," you joke? All of a sudden this felt like school.

"Yes," Dirk replied in a no-nonsense tone before pulling out a laminated, color-coordinated sheet of paper. "The components I recommend using are E, the second A, and of course, the D. E is for express. You can tell your dream boat how you feel about them and express your feelings. Next up is A," he points to the A in MAN "which stands for 'appear confident.' I think this is self-explanatory. And last but not least, the D. For this part you describe the situation to the coffee shop hottie."

Dirk slips the sheet back into his briefcase and closes the latch. "Now that was a lot of information, do you have any questions?"

"So many," you reply. Your mind is churning with them. "Could we come up with some type of script so that I can practice using these?"

Dirk opens his briefcase and pulls out a notebook. "I thought you'd never ask y/n."

******

It was a few days since you had the study session with Dirk. Now you were sitting in your car, parked in front of the café. You take a deep breath, a self-soothing skill Dirk introduced you to. Today was the day. You were going to approach your crush and try to establish a relationship.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see them walking across the parking lot from your rear-view mirror. Quickly, you duck before they walk past your window and notice you taking breaths large enough to fill the lungs of an elephant.

You hear a bell chime as they enter the shop. Before exiting your car and going into no-mans land you count to 100 in order to calm your spiraling mind.

98...

99...

100.

Not giving yourself time to rethink what you were about to do, you get out of your car and enter the café.

You spot them right away. How could you not? Their beauty was absolutely bewitching and eye-catching. You watched as they swiped their credit card, paying for their usual order. God, even their hands were attractive.

The coffee shop hottie walked over to the pick-up area to wait for their drink, standing idly and scrolling on their phone.

This was your chance.

Taking one more deep breath, you approach the ravishing person. You stop a distance from them, one that was respectful yet close enough to get their attention.

The second A. Appear Confident.

You give the attractive individual a big smile. Nervous people don't smile. You put your hand out for a handshake and speak your first words to them.

"Hey, I'm y/n." Inside you were absolutely shitting yourself, but on the outside, you appeared as cool as a cucumber getting cryotherapy.

They put their phone into their back pocket before tentatively shaking your hand. "I'm Taylor," they reply, "what's up?"

On the inside, you were jumping, screaming, and crying on the floor. But you kept your cool as a Dirk apprentice would do. You realize you haven't answered them yet. You didn't think you'd get this far.

The E. Express how you feel about the situation.

"I've seen you coming around the shop lately and was wondering if you were new around here?" You were lying through your teeth. You knew they'd recently moved from Toledo, Ohio. Hell, last night you had even found pictures of their 8th birthday party on their mom's Facebook.

"Uh yeah I actually just moved here last month," Taylor responded.

"Well, I'd love to show you around the city if you'd like. I mean you've already found the best coffee shop but there are other cool places nearby," you rush out in one breath.

"Iced lavender oat milk latte for Taylor!" The barista calls from over the counter.

"One sec," they say going to pick up their drink.

You look down at your feet and rub your sweaty palms together. God, did he touch these sticky-ass hands of yours?

Before you can go into a spiral about the activity of your sweat glands Taylor returns. They stand closer to you than before. Was this a good sign?

"Would you be down to go get lunch somewhere?" They ask. "You could be my tour guide on the way too."

Inside you were screaming, crying, jumping, pulling your hair, hissing, sobbing, sliding down a wall dramatically, and punching the wall. In summary, going feral.

But like a normal person, you smiled and replied sweetly, "Of course! That sounds fun. Do you have any preference for cuisine?"

Taylor considers for a moment. "I could really go for a greasy bacon cheeseburger right now. Do you know a place with that?"

Oh. God.

To be continued...?