[Hidden Love] /Phillipa Soo& Sara Barreilles

Truths

Sara's POV

"I just need to go to my dressing room, real quick." I excused myself before I quickly left the room. I felt how my cheeks started to blush slightly and my breath got heavier. In this moment I just couldn't process the fact that I just kissed Pippa. And the fact, which scared me the most was that it felt good and I wanted to kiss her again.

As I finally was out of the room, I let out a deep breathe. I had to pull myself together. I'm with Hannah and Hannah only. She was the one person with whom I want to be with for the rest of my life, wasn't she? I just thought about how I couldn't start to question my feelings for Hannah so suddenly. Hannah took this huge step for me today and told everyone she's my girlfriend. I'd be a giant dick, if I was telling her now that I wasn't even sure if I loved her anymore. But something about that kiss with Pippa was special and I haven't felt this kind of feeling since the time we were a couple all those years ago. I actually already forgot that I could feel such things but Pippa remembered me.

As I was walking towards my dressing room, I noticed that I left my bottle of water behind the stage so I went back to the room, in which I left my bottle and Hannah and Pippa a few seconds ago. But as I was approaching the door, which wasn't completely shut, I heard them talking from the inside. At first I didn't care, until I listened to what they were saying. "I want you to tell Sara the truth." I heard Pippa talking, so I hesitated to go into the room and waited to hear what this conversation was about. "What truth?" I heard Hannah talking. "The truth about us." I asked myself what Pippa meant by saying that. "Us? I'm not going to tell her anything about that. Sara and me are happy right now." I already wanted to go inside and ask them, but then I heard Pippa talking again. "If you're not going to tell her, I'll tell her. I can't lie to her anymore, because we literally had an affair while you were dating Sara."

"What did you say?" I don't even remember how I walked into the room but I did and stared at both of them standing infront of me. Both of them looked at me shocked and completely pale. "Sara, hey. Let me explain-" But I didn't let Hannah finish her foolish explanation. "You two had an affair?" I asked, while I noticed how tears were already in my eyes. "Sara, it was completely meaningless." Hannah then said and took three steps towards me and tried to hold my hand, but I backed off. "Sara-" Pippa was then the one to talk and I looked at her in disbelief. "Why didn't you tell me?" I didn't want to sound angry but I couldn't control myself. Phillipa had an affair with my girlfriend and she could've told me but didn't. She was suddenly a completely different person to me. Was that the Pippa I knew, the Pippa I used to love, the Pippa with whom I'm falling in love again. "I tried to contact Hannah, after I knew that you two are a couple but she didn't-" "Stop it Pips. Just save your cheap explanations. I-" I started to stutter and noticed how my hands started to shake, while tears were streaming down my face. "I need to be alone." Was the last thing I said, before I left the room again. I heard how both Pippa and Hannah called my name but I chose to ignore them. I needed to process this whole evening by myself. And looking into either Hannah's or Pippa's eyes again, would hurt too much.

I was already in my dressing room and changed from my costume into my normal clothes as I heard a knock on the door. "Leave me alone, Hannah and Pippa." I said but got surprised that it wasn't either of them. "What if it's neither of them?" I heard a voice infront of the door. I immediately went to it and opened the door, just to see Gavin standing there. "Oh my god, Sara-" He exclaimed as he probably noticed my red eyes, but I shut him down, by hugging him without any explanation. Gavin returned the hug and I felt how he calmly rubbed my back, while I sobbed into his t-shirt. You know what people say: 'A hug from Gavin a day, keeps all sadness away.'

"Should we go inside?" He asked me after a moment. Then I noticed that we were still standing in the doorframe, so I nodded and Gavin followed me into my dressing room. We both sat down together on my couch and he took my hand. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" He asked gently and I started to tell him the whole story. I told him about me and Pippa and how we were so in love and how we broke up years ago and how I met Hannah and was happy. And of course I told him about them having an affair together, which was probably the most difficult part of the story. To that time, I just didn't process this yet. As I was finished, I found myself in Gavins arms again. He has always been such a supportive friend to me and I wouldn't know what I'd do without him anymore.