You were tired when you finally went to bed to sleep by yourself the next night, had made yourself busy all day so that you would have an easy time falling asleep. You crawled into bed after having said goodnight to everyone, some of the guys a little apprehensive. "Don't worry, I'll check on her when I go to bed," Yoongi assured them quietly. He did, poking his head in to your room to hear you breathing heavily. You had fallen asleep fairly easily, and slept solidly for a couple of hours.
But then after a bit you shifted in your sleep, stretching your arms out. Where there would usually be a body sleeping next to yours there was nothing, and that was what woke you up. Your eyes opened and you slowly stretched your arm out farther, confused when you met no resistance. You sat up. You were alone and you didn't like it. You slipped out of bed and padded down the hall, opening the closest door and crossing the dark room carefully.
"Mm? Gray?"
Namjoon's voice grumbled sleepily as you slipped into his bed next to him. He just scooted over and opened his arms, letting you under the blanket as you snuggled up. You immediately fell back to sleep, feeling safe and secure and warm, Namjoon's steady presence comforting you. So the first night of trying to sleep alone was a failure.
The next night you did better. When you reached out and felt no one you woke up again, but you had prepared a talk for yourself in this situation. It's okay, you thought. I'm alone in this bed but I'm in a house full of people who love me. So I'm not really alone.
You forced your eyes closed and pulled a pillow to your chest. I'm not alone. But after a few moments it wasn't enough, and you were pushing the pillow aside and jumping to your feet, leaving your room and dashing down the hall.
You slipped into a different room this time and Jungkook scooted over to make room for you happily, snuggling his face into your chest and sharing his bed. His strong arms came around your waist and even though there was a nagging voice in the back of your head telling you that you had failed, you ignored it in favor of letting yourself be comforted by Jungkook's body. Two nights in a row though, you hadn't made it.
"How's it going?" Yoongi asked you that evening. You bit the inside of your cheek.
"No success yet," you admitted.
"Want me to just sleep in with you tonight?" He offered.
"Try again tomorrow?"
You shook your head.
"I can do it," you said, more for yourself than for him.
You were exhausted, had forced yourself to get up early and avoid caffeine the whole day. So when you got into bed you fell asleep easily. You reached out a couple hours later, hands coming into contact with nothing again, but you didn't let yourself panic. There's no one there, you told yourself, pulling a pillow to your chest for something to hold onto. I'm alone. And that's okay. You went back to sleep.
"Good morning, baby girl," a voice said, hours later. You opened your eyes slowly, alone in your bed, Seokjin standing over you. He was softly stroking your hair back from your face.
"Well, you did it." You smiled.
"Yeah," you said, feeling pleased with yourself.
- "Can like four of you sleep in my bed tonight?" You asked at dinner.
"I thought you were sleeping alone?" Namjoon asked.
"I did. And now I know I can if I want to. Which I don't. Please cuddle me," you said, looking at them hopefully and earning some laughs.
That night Jungkook, Jimin, and Taehyung all piled in your bed, cuddled up close. You snuggled into them happily, feeling safe and warm.
- "Baby girl, how do you feel about going to therapy anyway?" Seokjin asked you a couple days later.
