!trigger warning!
when they had gotten home that day.
midoriya sat on his bed, not in the mood to hangout with the others.
he thought about how he felt that morning. it wasn't as if they meant anything bad by it, they left to go to school so they wouldn't be late.
so why did he feel disappointed when they did themselves a favour?
it shouldn't have mattered to him.
but when they left and were nowhere to be found by the time he finished. he desperately wanted to run back to his room. he felt bad, he'd taken too long.
he interacted with the others but immediately after getting back. he chose to sit in his room instead of ruining the others' happy moods.
that's when the little voice started to whisper.
"they don't care. they never did."
midoriya found himself leaned up against the wall.
staring at the wall ahead of him, trying to ignore the voice as best as he could.
"why don't you pick up the blade izuku? they won't care"
"no....i can't"
tears trickled gently down his cheeks.
a familiar burn spreading in his throat.
"i can't.." a quiet sob left his mouth.
he let himself drop to the side, pulling his legs into his body as he tried to silence the voice and his own sobs.
he simply couldn't do anything.
grabbing his pillow, he placed it over his face and pressed it on his mouth.
his sobs becoming muffled.
he was suffering and he despised himself for it.
he despised himself for not being able to say what was wrong.
he wanted to scream, he wanted to say something.
he wanted to shout out to his friends and tell them that he was suffering.
but the little voice continued to whisper ever so softly that he felt comforted by the thing that was destroying him.
"i'm the only one here izuku, because nobody cares."
he felt oddly comforted by it, that his sobs died down and he fell asleep.
again, tomorrow was another day.
YOU ARE READING
relapse
FanfictionTHIS IS ALL JUST A BIG WARNING "i try my best to keep myself from relapsing, but each passing day, it gets harder." ~*~ [relapse, depression, self-harm]
