Saddling Up {thewattys2015}

Chapter 18

(two more chapters and then my first wattpad book is for finished! 🎈)

It was Dad's funereal today. We were so busy, we couldn't have it until now. Mom was still trying to speak to me. I had forgiven her a tiny bit but still held resentment against her and tried to speak very little to her.

I showered quickly after having breakfast with mom. I got dressed in a black cocktail dress. It went down to my knees and was very flowy. I grabbed my cellphone and slipped it into my clutch and went downstairs. Mom sat at the island, holding the marble ash container which contained Dad's ashes. She kisses the container softly and begins to weep. I come up behind her and sit down beside her.

I grab hold of her shoulders and try to comfort her. She wipes her tears and says "I'm sorry El, I didn't see you there." "Its fine mom." I whisper softly, trying to hold back tears as I think about how Dad loved us both so much. I bite my lip as I remember how he used to take me to the big races in Kentucky during summer vacation.

Mom hugs me as the tears come loose. "It's not fair." I began to whimper. Mom sighs "It's not fair, Isn't it? No Eleanor, Life isn't very fair. You having to come home isn't very fair either but it's what was best for us at the time; now I'm beginning to doubt my choice. But alas, It's too late to go back on desicions that were made in the past."

I begin to cry harder, finally realizing that I would never ever see Mr.Rossi again, I'd never go to nationals, I'd never see Brittnay, or cook with Brittnay, or ride with Brittnay. I'd never go on another trail ride with Paige or Nicole. I'd never ever step foot on the lush campus ever again.

As mom lead my crying self to the car, I hugged her tight. Mom looked at me. "Momma. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I told you I hated you, or you were ugly. I'm sorry for ignoring you, for being hateful. I forgive you mommy. I love you so much Momma." Mom hugged me tightly. "It's ok sweetheart. I understand. Now let's go put Dad to rest."

In the car ride there, We shared happy stories about Dad. "Remember that time at Halloween, He dressed up Mrs.Halloway and kept on saying "Hi I'm Mrs.Halloway, I teach math but I don't even understand English! Duhhhh..." Mom chuckled as she pulled into the cemetery.

I laughed too, but stopped as soon as Grandma Hastings glared at us. She was Dad's mother and she hated us. I smiled at her sweetly. "Why hello, Grandma!"

She glared at me and didn't respond. I caught up with Mom and stood with her at the front of the grave. I pulled out my cue-cards, trying to remember my speech. I murmured the words over and over again in my head. Mom wiped her tears with a lace handkerchief.

It was soon time for the speeches. I went up onto the wood box podium and tried to speak loud and clear.

"Hello! Uhh, I'm Eleanor Hastings, The only child of Gail and Robert Hastings. My dad was the best man I ever knew. He was selfless, brave and childish. Childish in a good way. He certanliy knew how to have a good laugh! Right before he passed, He said to me "I love you so much sweetie, my heart aches. You will take the equestrian world by storm, You know how to do things, you don't even know about!" I'm taking those words to heart and I will forever be trying to please him. I love you Daddy, forever and always."