Living Nightmare

Chapter Seventeen

*the previous evening*

They tell you to get in the car. You do.

They tell you to drive. You do.

You arrive at the destination and get out the car. There's weapons in the backseat. You take a gun. You approach the building. The door is locked. You break it. You ascend the stairs to the right floor. You knock. The target answers.

He instantly notices the gun in your hand. He starts fighting. You fight back; you win.

He's on the floor.

He's begging for his life. He says he has a family. He doesn't want to leave them.

"Shoot him."

You do.

They give you your next target. You return to your car and drive to the next place. It's a large house. They tell you to sneak in. There's open window, upstairs to the side of the house. You climb in. It's a child's room. The bed is empty. You leave the room and sneak downstairs. Voices in the next room. You look through a small gap in the door. A man and a woman.

"Kill them both."

Dead in seconds.

"Who are you?"

You spin around. It's the child. She looks five, maybe six.

"Her too."

You're trying to fight it.

No.

Your head suddenly aches.

Stop it.

"Do it."

You raise the gun.

***

It's almost morning. They've told you to go home. That's where you're headed. You're still half an hour away. The sun is rising.

"It's too late. End program."

Your eyes shut. You're asleep at the wheel. The car turns. It drives up onto the sidewalk and straight through the window of a bodega. You didn't have your seatbelt on. You fly forward and crash head first through the windshield.

Someone heard the crash. They call 911. People gather. You're recognised. Reporters arrive. So does the ambulance. The paramedics take you to the hospital. You're in the ambulance. Your eyes flutter open. You faint again. The entire ride, you're falling in and out of consciousness. You arrive at the hospital. You don't wake up again. You're rushed to an operating room. You don't feel anything.

Hours pass.

***

I don't know where I am. I hear beeping. A heart monitor?

I'm in a hospital room.

I don't know what happened.

Everything aches. My head, in particular. I hear voices. I want them to shut up. I want them to go away.

Except him. I need him. I don't open my eyes, but I say his name.

That shuts them up.

I hear my name. It's not him. I slowly open my eyes. There's so many people. I don't like it.

He's not there.

"Bucky" I groan again.

They talk again. Some to each other, some to me. They're asking how I feel. They say they're so glad I'm okay. They ask me to talk to them. They ask if I'm okay as I close my eyes again.

Why is he not here?

I want to go back to sleep. I can't. They're still trying to talk to me. I have to open my eyes again to face them. My vision is blurry. Tears. I can't help it. It's too much.

I want him. I need him.

"Bucky" I moan. The tears fall. Where is he?

They're comforting me now. Some of them leave. I look at the ones remaining. I know some of them. The rest are doctors.

Why won't they leave me alone?

The door swings open. Finally. He runs to the bed but pauses right next to it. I smile at him. He smiles at me. He gently touches my face. It hurts. I don't care.

Someone on the other side of me touches my arm. I flinch.

He asks for privacy. They go. He looks at me again. He brushes some hair out of my face. He slowly lowers himself into a chair.

"Bucky" I say happily.

"Hi baby." He cups my cheek in his hand. His thumb brushes away a falling tear. "You're okay" his voice breaks.

"I'm okay" I repeat. I'm not, really, but I don't want to worry him. He knows I'm lying, anyways.

I want to get out of bed. I know I can't. I want to hug him and kiss him and never leave him again. I never want him to leave me.

"I want to go home."

Buck glances at the closed door, then back at me. "I know. We can go home soon. I'll get the doctor so we can-" He begins to stand up. I grab his hand and grip it tightly. He faces me worriedly.

"Please don't go."

He sits back down. "Y/n-"

"Please."

"I'm not going anywhere doll, I promise." He kisses the back of my hand. He stays and stares out the window until he makes eye contact with someone. I just watch him as he does.

Eventually, a doctor comes in. I squeeze Bucky's hand and he squeezes back.

"Hello y/n. My name is Dr Shepard. I'm a neurosurgeon and I'm here to help you make a full recovery."

I look at Bucky. He smiles at me assuringly. I face the doctor and nod but at him to continue.

"How are you feeling?" he asks.

"Um. My head hurts... more than anything else. Can you tell me what happened? I don't really remember anything after..." I realise I don't know how long I've been here. "When... h-how long has it been since we..." I trail off, not wanting to say it out loud.

"That was yesterday doll" Bucky answers.

"What happened?"

He explains. He tells me I woke up. Tony was there. I listen to how I hurt Tony as I escaped. Bucky tells me I was in a car crash this morning. I was brought to the hospital. I've had two surgeries already. The doctor tells me a bit about those.

"And, doll, we have really good news" Bucky says. I face him. I could do with some really good news right now.

"What is it?"

"Well, I can promise you that you will never sleep walk again."

"Bucky" I sigh. "How can you promise that?"

"Because we found out what was happening."

Bucky explains everything about a device that was in my head. Apparently Hydra did it. It all makes sense by the time he's done talking. And I can't help smiling. I'm so relieved.

"So it means everything is okay" Bucky concludes. "I know for a fact that we'll be fine, y/n."