World of darkness : Book two : back from the dead

Part 33 : new love ?

( pov mara )

After coming to the realisation i ....like Daryll.......as in like....OK I LOVE HIM....i am fixing it hard to focus on my work and trying to work on finishing the armour for Patrick

Its just ......ive never had feelings like this ever ..i dont know what im meant to do

" ok mara just calm down your fine its not like .....oh what am i saying i cant keep this secret ...does Daryll even like me like that back " i was pacing back and forth conflicted on what i should do while the armour just sat there unfinished on my work table

I couldn't even sit still for a second i was so scared of telling Daryll how i felt but i dont even know why i felt that way is it just because i dont want a chance at being rejected ????...i dont even know

" ok simple plan ...i tell him how i feel and ......AHHHH NOO !!!" I put my hands on my face and just muttered to myself completely flustered and blushing

Why cant i just confess how i feel !!!!!!

How is it this hard to confess to a guy just tell him i like him that way and id like to be with him .....ahh now just thinking about it makes me embarrassed

I decided to go outside and try clear my head but by the time i had thought of this it was dark out probably 1 am at least and it was freezing

The cold wasnt bothering me though since my face was still red thinking about Daryll so i was warm and flustered still just trying to think of something that could take my mind off things

If not even the freezing cold of the frost bourne couldnt even knock sense it to me what would i thought to myself

I eventually had done 3 laps around the base we were staying at before i went up on a tallish hill and sat on top of it with my head on my hands not knowing what to do

" come on .....i cant let this just distract me and i cant let Daryll be thrown off his game either if i tell him how i feel " but if i held them inside i wouldnt be able to focus

I went and lied on my back on the snow not caring it was cold or wet

" mara come on ....just tell him how you feel get it off your chest and then if he says yes you can maybe be happy with him ...i mean hes just kinda hot and the things he could do to me with his extra ar-.......AHHH WHAT AM I THINKING!!!!" I turned over and smushed my face in he snow and screamed at my self for what i was about to say

There's no way i would ask him to do that kind of stuff to me .......would i , i slapped myself in the face with each hand after removing it from the snow and tried to get to my senses

But suddenly i heard some one walked by and i straight away jolted and sat up and looked around for who it was panicking the had just heard me scream about this

But it was only kyle .....KYLE!!!!!

Kyle " what are you doing up so late mara ?" He walked up to me as i wiped the snow off my body

" uhhh just thought id go out for a little walk take a break from working to hard you know ha ha " i laughed nervously hoping he didnt hear what i said

Kyle " im surprised your not freezing out hear you arent as good with the cold as some of us and im not sure your outfit has to many layers ....oh sorry that sounds weird " he smiled as he apologised which i didn't think it was that weird but i was still nice

" now that you mention it ...." Suddenly the cold hit me like a army of speeding bullets of frost "...ok im a little bit cold " i put my arms around myself and started shaking slightly