Erasermic angst

2. TW. Death

Aizawa stood, shocked and quickly numbing. Oboro. Oboro. He was dead. And aizawa had killed him. Well, that's what he convinced himself. He was alone, the police and other hero's running around and cleaning up the scene, attending to oboro and rushing him to a hospital. But no one came to aizawa. No one-
"SHO- OH MY GOD!"
someone cared. He cared. Relief overtook aizawas numbness for less than a second, and he found he was stuck in the position he was in. Aizawa couldn't move or he knew the emotionless mask he was keeping up would break. Hizashi reached aizawa and tentatively placed a hand on the others shoulder, making aizawa accidentally flinch hard and make eye contact with him. He braced for a slap that usually came next. No. That's his parents. His Hizashi wouldn't hurt him, and aizawa knew that. His eyes felt full of fear, and hizashi saw it. Of course he did.
"Can you move sho? Or speak? I can help you, it's okay you're not alone now."
Aizawa couldn't move, or speak. He just stood, one hand holding tight to his other arm, nails digging deeper into his own skin. deeper, deeper, deeper. He felt blood finally drip down his arm.
Hizashi looked for any signs of moving, and watching aizawas eyes dart around in panic, he rubbed the others arm lovingly and picked him up. Aizawa flinched again, his body stiff against hizashis as he cradled his love. He carried aizawa swiftly to a deserted alley, placing his back against the wall and sliding down until aizawa was sat in his lap.
"Oh baby, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry sho." Hizashi gripped aizawa in a loose hug while aizawa immediately bawled his eyes out, gripping tightly to his shirt. He had held all this emotion in since he had seen him fall under the debris that came from the battle. To him it was embarrassing to hear his own broken sobs and whines but he couldn't bring himself to care, all aizawa could feel was the guilt and questions wracking through his body. What if I saved him? Why wasn't I quicker? I could have done something, I could have-
"Come on love, stop thinking about it. I know it's all you can feel right now, all you can think about. Like you can't tear your mind away from it yeah? Just listen to my voice okay? I'm gonna rub circles into your back to keep you grounded and in the present, focus on that too."
Aizawa nodded and felt hizashis warm touch press gently into his back, soothing aizawa gradually into what felt like he was floating. Now he couldn't think, couldn't feel, couldn't do anything.

Hizashi pressed his face into aizawas hair. silent tears fell down his cheeks, his body shaking as he tried to stop them. He shouldn't be crying, right? Shouta was the one who saw oboro die, so why is he grieving so much?
"Sho?"
"Mmh." Shouta rubbed at his eyes and laid weakly against his boyfriend.
"It's not your fault."
"But-"
"No." Hizashi smoothed a hand down shoutas hair and held him. "You, are not to blame at all. There's nothing you could have done."
"I'm still sorry"
Shouta sniffed and squeezed his eyes shut as if he was trying to stop thinking.
"And I still love you Shouta, Nothing will ever change that. We will get through it together okay."
"Okay zashi."