I Won't Accept Your Regrets

Chapter 169

After giving my son some time, I intended to return to Raymond, but I could not. Carlisle didn't let go of me.

It turned out to be a burden to explain to him why he could not meet with his father right now, and he kicked and resisted.

In the end, I had to go for a walk with Carlisle.

It was already midnight at the moment when he deigned to have supper and go to bed.

And as soon as Carlisle fell asleep, I went straight to the Sunshine Palace, to Raymond's bedroom.

Arriving at the place, I saw the doctor retreating, as if he had just finished with an examination.

"Herrington, how is His Majesty?"

"I was worried that I would have to watch him for the next days. His Majesty will grow stronger rather than expectations. And if you give him a couple of days off, he will soon be able to return to the imperial routine."

How quickly he got better, unlike Carlisle.

"Good job."

"Then I'll leave you."

The doctor left, and Helen came in his place.

"Would you like to sleep here today, Your Majesty?"

It would be nice to be around until tomorrow.

I went up to Raymond and saw all the servants out.

Although he was still unconscious, the doctor's words that he was recovering were not a lie. And the color of his face changed to some extent.

I sat down in a chair by the bed.

As I looked at him, many thoughts came into my head.

Can I be by your side?

Can we live happily?

All my life I thought that there was no happiness for us ... Maybe that was my mistake.

The moment I threw these questions into myself, there was a low moan.

"Um-um."

I hurried to him, wondering where it hurt.

And when I was about to call all the doctors, his broken voice rang in my ears.

"Ellie..."

He opened his eyes. Our views crossed.

I was so surprised at that moment and blinked a lot.

Are you already conscious?

As fast as the recovery is going, isn't it too soon?

But, if you look around, his condition was a little strange. It is clear that his eyes were open, but the focus was blurred.

Consciousness returned only for a while?

I looked down at him.

"I need more sleep. How good it is in a dream..."

He whispered and pulled the covers up to his chest, intending to go back to sleep.

But then he opened his lips again. At first, the sound was too weak to be recognized.

He spoke endlessly.

Is he delusional?

Then my name was heard.

Now he was looking for me with his dim eyes.

"Ellie ... I want to see..."

Excitement hit me the moment I heard this desperate call.

Seeing that he was attracted to me even in such a clouded mind, the tears that I had been holding back all this time suddenly flooded over the edge.

Ever since he went to bed with the poisoning, I have held on to the idea that I should be on the lookout, but in reality I was just playing false bravado.

I didn't even know how scared I was to lose him.

"Wake up, Ray..."

I clung to him, about to collapse again into powerlessness.

I put my hand on his broad shoulder, buried my face in his chest and poured out all the regret I had experienced.

Raymond missed me in spite of the worry and pain.

A month ago, I could not have imagined tears in Raymond's arms, but now I clung to him like this.

I am still afraid that he is about to disappear somewhere.

"Ellie.

I heard his voice and felt a large hand on my back. He patted me on the back, as if soothing.

"Don't faint anymore, please..."

Raising my head above his chest, I met his gaze.

Blurred eyes stared at me. It seemed that consciousness is still not very clear.

He nodded slowly in response and closed his eyes. Soon even breathing was heard.

The energy of the drugs awakened him only for a while, but now he fell asleep again.

And my sanity also returned to its place as his hand fell from my back onto the bed.

Threw away the dignity of the empress and whine here in his arms.

The latter is more surprising than the former.

No, I will choose to stay here.

"Eh..."

Taking a deep breath and calming my mind, I looked at Raymond, who was sound asleep again.

A smile of satisfaction now hung on his face.

I tried to look away, but I couldn't.

The point is that it has entered my mind again.

Can I leave you at all?

Lisa is dead, the crown prince's place is taken.

Raymond's life was out of danger.

And now, when everything has fallen into place, I need to prepare to leave him.

But I doubt what I want.

I thought that if I accept it, it will become a ticket to my bitter past.

But now, looking back, everything has changed dramatically between the past and the present.

My position and Raymond's feelings for me.

I was so afraid of being rejected by him that I myself obsessively pushed him away. But wouldn't it be self-deception to say that the passage in my heart is closed to him?

If I take one more step towards, maybe we can start all over again.

Questions buried deep in my heart made me dizzy.

Now there was only one answer to everything:

I'm not going anywhere.

However, I need a little more time to think.

I may be overwhelmed right now.

But even though I thought so, I couldn't get away from Raymond and stayed awake all night.

****

The chirping of birds was already spreading throughout the area. Raymond slowly opened his eyes to the clear sound entering his mind.

Clap clap.

As if it would help wake him up, he blinked slowly several times.

"It's all a dream."

He turned his head to the side and fixed his gaze.

Because he saw Ellie sleeping in his bed.

Her silvery hair covered her cheeks, and her eyelashes, like silver threads, fell over her closed eyes.

It was a beauty comparable to starlight.

If this is a dream, isn't it too sweet to wake up?

Ellie's words dreamed at night.

I even seemed to hear a sound.

I prayed so many times to see her before I died.

God took pity at least once, fulfilled my dying wish?

Raymond, who was looking at Ellie asleep, suddenly realized that this moment was too real to be a dream.

The sun was rising in the deep blue sky, and Ellie's breathing sounded like it wasn't a dream at all.

"Strange affair."

If everything was in reality, then why is it so easy for him?

Then he remembered Ellie's face just before he passed out.

He still remembered the last moment.

So, is it true that Ellie is around now?

I didn't mean to show you something like that ...

I didn't want to let you know that I was dying.

How long has it been since I've been lying like this?

Ellie's eyelids flinched suddenly.

Raymond held his breath without realizing it, and Ellie opened her eyes.

She raised her head and looked at him in surprise.

"Raymond!"

"Ellie."

"Do you have pain somewhere? Something with the stomach, or something like that?"

I quickly laid out my concerns, while Raymond confined himself to a gentle look at me.

I spoke first, not expecting to wait for his answer.

"Ray, you lay there for three days. Tell me something. Call a doctor?"

Raymond fell asleep deeply for three days after the moment when his consciousness returned in passing.

And all this time I was near.

I spent time with Carlisle during the day, but did not leave Raymond at night.

I was worried and could not sleep well.

"For three whole days ... Ellie, you were very surprised, and I'm sorry about that.

Raymond began with an apology.

He lay unconscious for three days, but worried about me before his own well-being?

"I don't need your regrets. You are still in this world. I would never forgive you if you just took and died in front of me."

"You say I'm alive?"

Raymond gave me a puzzled look and asked.

He was injected with an antidote while he lay barely alive. Looks like he still thought he was poisoned.

"We made an antidote."

Raymond's pupils dilated.

"Then ... It worked, is that why I woke up?"

"Ray, why didn't you tell me? You knew my abilities. It was in my power to save that flower, the main ingredient in the antidote. Why the hell didn't you tell me?"