Loving you is killing me (Harry Styles fanfiction)

Chapter one

I was standing in the corner of the club, still shaking... Felt like everybody's watching me, but with another looks than normaly... Like I'm something bad, maybe I saw some sadness... Im being paranoid! Gosh Carly, nobody's watching you!!

Somebody cought my hand and I almost ran out of my skin. I turned around and saw Frankie smiling at me. I felt big relief going through all my body. "Heya, I was looking for you!! Did you hear it? Harry Styles got his eye on some girl!!! I wish I knew who is that poor babe!" When she said it, it felt like somebody pushed a knife right into my stomach! I took a sharp breath and looked at my best friend. "It's me Frankie..... He got his eyes on me...." I saw pure shock in her face, she looked at me with tears in her eyes and whispered: "Im so sorry Carly, I din't know it's you.... I think he's not that bad...." "And you are really bad liar Frankie, but thanks, and you know what? I think Im gonna be fine, I just tell him, I don't want him and everything will be ok again!" Even I knew that it's the most stupid thing I've ever done, I went to find Harry.

I couldn't  find him, this club is way too big and full of people to find one damn person. I gave it up, told myself that if I can't find him, that he's not here. I smiled for myself and went hunting. How I love this man hunting. I came to one blond guy, he was really cute!! "Heya, how are you?" I made a sexy smile at him. He looked confused, made a shy smile and said: "Uhm, hey, Im fine, thanks, how are you?" "Well, I'd be better if you ask me to dance with you" this always works. "Yeah, I don't think I can dance with you. Sorry, you're pretty and everything but...... I wanna survive" he said sadly. I was looking at him totaly shocked! Nobody, had ever said anything like this to me before!! Im Carly Deens, girl who can have everyone!! "What? I have no idea what are you talking here about!" I almost shouted at him. "Im sorry, I'd love to bring you home, but your boyfriend is pretty creepy, you know?" "My what? Excuse me, but I'm single more than you think, who the hell told you this shit?" I was so pissed, I wanted to cry! "Well, your boyfriend, Harry Styles, everyone knows that you're his new girl!" That made me furious! Im not anyone's girl! I had only one boyfriend and I don't wanna have another, like ever! I love my lifestyle- boy for night, then goodbye- nothing to change, nothing to talk about! I really needed to find that idiot.

Suddenly, I saw few people standing around one person. They all were laughing and when I came closer, I saw that the one 'funny' person was Styles. I squeezed through all the people, caught Styles' arm and push him away. "Who the fuck you think you are?!" I screamed at him. He looked amusedly. "What don't you like love? Is everything ok?" he was really laughing right into my face! "I'M NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND, WE'RE NOT DATING, YOU ARE ONE BIG IDIOT, I HATE YOU, YOU DON'T KNOW ME! Why are you doing all of this?" I was punching into his chest like a little girl, but you know, the alcohol and all the anger was doing their job! "Easy love, you're exactly what I want. Heard you are sex God, your body is obviously perfect, everyone wants you and nobody can have you. Only me, I love this feeling! And you can do nothing with it!" again that stupid smile! That was enough for me, I raised my hand and slapped him right onto his left cheek. His smile was gone, anger was the one feeling that replaced it. He grabbed my wrist so hard that I had to squeeked out! "Oh Carly, I think you don't know what are you doing, do you? You're the first girl who has ever punched me. And honestly, I'd be more than happy to hit you too! But... I don't punch ladies! You're one lucky lady, you know babe?" his foolish smile was there again. He was still holding my wrist, but harder with every my movement. After few seconds I felt that if he push my wrist harder, he'd break my bones. "Ouch, Harry, let me go, it hurts and I mean, it hurts a lot! You'll break my wrist you idiot!" When I shouted this, I realised that I felt the same way like I did when I was 12. I wanted to push this memory out of my head, but I couldn't! I felt so weak again, I looked at Harry scared as hell. I think he saw the change in my face cause he suddenly left my wrist alone. He looked like he cares... Oh of course Carly, Harry Styles, the fighter would care about you! You stupid bitch, that's what you are, that's what you always was! I started to run. That was everything I could think of, RUN AWAY CARLY! He'll chase you like your father did. And that's when all my bad memories came to me. I was pushing them away so long, but right now... I was too weak to splash them, they ran over me just like a fast car.