Leonardo Dicaprio Imagines

But I love him

Your (p.o.v.)
Clouding my thoughts all the memories of him. The memories we have together. All the good times and all the bad times. He meant something to me. Not just something he was everything to me. He was the love of my life for fucks sake. I've never been in love before. Until I met him and I really knew what love was. Love is a overwhelming feeling. I never felt it until I met him. He is overwhelming. His presence is overwhelming. These three years have been hell for me. I lost myself. I lost my old identity. I wanted the old me back but she never was going to come back. She grew up and moved on. I never grew up and moved on. So when I started to have love for this man I didn't know what it was. How it was supposed to feel. It confused me a lot. I felt like a child learning something new. Like a new subject that confused me and that I didn't seem to get. All this pain I felt that has been buried. I talk about it like it's all aright when I buried it all inside. But love dug it up and not put a bandaid because that is temporary. It put stitches so it could heal and the scars of my past can fade away. Fading away so as I grow,  it won't affect me anymore. Love breaks all the generation curses that our ancestors and parents bestowed on us. All the things they said we can't do we will make sure to do. We aren't our parents we are better. That's what brings me comfort. Wanting to get with a guy who is nothing like your dad or even your horrible wicked step dad. The adults in your life being a example of what not to do. Not being like your mother who stayed with the man who tore your whole family apart. That's why I wanted someone so badly to love. To take me away from this living hell of a house I live in. Where the devil resides. Where he takes every moment to constantly tear your family apart and leave you in the middle to fend for yourself. To pick up the pieces that have been left. But you aren't anyone important to be doing that. Your just a girl. A girl who wants to be loved. But the guy who loves you lives inside your head. In your imagination don't you remember he left? He left ages ago and moved on. To bigger and better things. Those things not being you.