Since I'm not into the whole "Dear Diary" thing,I guess I should just start writing...
Hey,I've never written down my feelings before but lately I've been going through a lot and my friends said that this should help so why not ? To start this off,my girlfriend is pregnant...yea I know typical kids having sex without protection,blah blah blah,but that's not the case ! My girlfriend and I have been with each other since the 8th grade and we are seniors now; you might think it's all peaches and cream when it's actually hell! People say if you're not happy in a relationship...end it,well I can't end it if my girlfriend is the lead guitarist in our band.Oh yea,our band is called Troubles Within... Kind of a lame name but whatever.In order for her to stay in the band, I have to stay with her because she rocks hard and when I say that I really mean it! When I decided that I was losing feelings for her, I thought it was because we never have sex like we use to so I decided that we should give it a go and see if our love rekindled.....needless to say,it didn't! We used a condom and I thought everything was fine until she came to my house drowning in tears with the pregnancy test in the box,already answered. By that time,I knew that I was going to be a father. The funny thing is that somehow she knew or found out I wasn't feeling her anymore and one of my buddies told me that she told his girlfriend that in order for her to keep me,she would have to get pregnant. Smart Bitch huh? I found out that she put a hole in the condom. Now I don't know what to do ?I'm 17 and about to be a father! I want to call her and spill out my fumes but that's just going to cause more than I need right now!Honestly, I'm not even worried about this band anymore due to the fact that I would have to look at her face and also my skill is off balance because of stress. One of the worst things is that, my parents don't even know and I don't plan on telling them but I have to ! My dad is going to kick me out of the house for sure and my mom will disown me! The second issue is that I won't be able to graduate with my class this year because I've been slacking off and practicing my ass off for the band so that we can audition for this contest called " RockMania", winners get a year long tour around the U.S. with chances of getting a record deal! There's no way my parents would even let me continue this dream I have because of my grades and the pregnancy is the icing on the cake ! I'm fucked either way so...... This was a nice stress reliever even though my fingers hurt.My parents are coming down the hall so I can have "The Talk" with them.Hope I live to write again !
