Branded for Failure

I was always here

It hurts, it hurts to breathe, it hurts to think. Memories pounded its way through his skull and froze his insides. And Tommy couldn't stop racing-

"Tommy, count with me buddy, just breathe in- two three four- out."

Tommy was crumpled on the floor gasping and heaving for air that escaped him. "I can't, I-I it's too much Dad make it go away, make it go away."

"Tommy, if you can talk you can breathe." Phil reasoned firmly. "Just count out your breathing."

Tomm's inhales sounded like nasty whistles but Phil talked him through every moment, and things started to quiet down.

"Tommy, where are you mate?" Phil asked. "Can you get to Dream? Or Tubbo or."

"No!" Tommy shouted his chest stuttering again. "Not them, not, not Dream."

"Okay Tommy." Phil said soothingly. "You don't have to see them, i'll come get you alright? Is that okay?"

Tommy nodded before realizing Phil couldn't see that and choked out. "Yes, please F-"

"Okay i'll be there before you know it." Phil affirmed. "Are you in your dorm? At the compound."

"No." Tommy rubbed his eyes, "I'm at-" He looked up at the neon sign. "Fundy's snacks and gas."

"Why- never mind. I'm coming, mate. Just stay on the line."

"Can't." Tommy said. "I'm borrowing this phone, I think the guy will want it back."

"Okay but don't move." Phil stressed. The sound was distant like Phil was trying to move and talk at the same time.

"I won't." Tommy agreed easily, he was way too tired to move anyways.

"Okay, love you bye."

"I-"

Tommy hung up and hit the ground with his fist. "I am so screwed." and managed a half crazed laugh. He went inside and gave the fox hybrid his phone back.

Then flopped onto the sidewalk outside the store and just laid there. The guy poked his head out the door and gave Tommy looks but didn't say anything. Tommy never lifted his head to see what kind of looks it was.

'This is why I have to have all the doors unlocked.' Phil had said the last time Tommy had seen his dad face to face. 'So you don't wake Wilbur stomping your way across the roof.'

It was dead of night, Phil sat at the breakfast counter sipping a cup of tea casually as though he had not just caught his youngest sneaking out.

Tommy crossed his arms. 'I tried out.'

'I know.'

'I got into the program.'

Phil dipped his head in acknowledgement. 'I knew you would.'

Tommy huffed in frustration. 'Then why did you try and stop me!'

Phil shushed him and pointed to the room above him. 'Wilbur was so determined to sleep without meds tonight. He will be so proud of himself in the morning.'

'Dad.' Tommy snapped. 'I am joining the program and you can't stop me.'

'I know.'

Tommy had been so angry and frustrated that night. At the time Tommy had no clue why, technically he was getting exactly what he wanted, what he dreamed for. Looking back Tommy just wanted someone to care enough to intervene.

'I am leaving in the morning full time.' Tommy stated firmly.

Phil held out his arm for a hug but Tommy just crossed his arms and turned away.

'You're too smart for your own good' Phill said but in the back of his head Tommy could hear Dream echo the same thing and-

Tommy screeched and pulled at his head. "Make it stop make it stop make it-"

There was a hand on his shoulder and Tommy flinched so hard he flew a few feet backwards. Blind panic making him scrambled away with pleads of forgiveness only stopped when he heard.

"Tommy I'm sorry, I am sorry. It's Phil, it's, it's Dad."

Tommy rubbed at his eyes to clear the tears. Phill was on his knees before him, with his stupid green and white stripped hat. His hand was pulled back, like he wanted to go to Tommy but his son's reaction stopped him.

"Dad?" Tommy croaked.

"Hey mate."

Tommy got to his feet and barreled into his fathers chest. Phil didn't react quite fast enough in surprise. A second too long to reciprocate the hug for Tommy to pull away and ramble.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." he ran a shaky hand through his hair. "I know you hate me and I threw everything you gave me away and you probably don't want to see me-"

Phil threw his arms around his son and Tommy hid his face in his chest sobbing. Even though he knew Phil must hate his guts he wanted to hide in his safety forever.

"Tommy, I was always here." Phil muttered into his hair. "I would wait by the phone, but the phone never rang. I am so freakin glad it did."