Soul-bound

11. The scent of elderflowers

The wind was ruffling my hair, bringing with it the scent of elderflowers.

The warm scent suited the colours of the setting sun so well. I tried to enjoy it.

I wasn't standing on our cliff side. Instead, I had walked a good distance to the east, far from any buildings, surrounded by birdsong and nature alone. Because I couldn't stand it. I couldn't stand our meeting place anymore.

I stood for a long time until I heard a rumbling behind me; thunderclouds. I turned to see a thick blanket of purple clouds approaching, and waited until they engulfed me. They brought with them a rare, heavy rain. I closed my eyes, turned my face up, remembering what Izuna had said.

"Tobirama is like a part of my soul. A part of my soul that is missing. A darkness and rigidity that all of us need. That I have shunned, as I have shunned him. He never allows me to doubt his love for me. Never allows me to be insecure. Whenever I drift off to the skies, he takes me back to Earth. He takes care of me. He takes care of me so much."

I let the rain wash my face, becoming prosthetics of the tears I couldn't cry. I was happy for him. So, so happy. No jealousy; not anymore. Instead, a goal.

And then I felt it.

His presence.

I drew my sword and turned round, and stopped with the blade against his neck.

"What do you want?" I asked.

Hashirama hadn't flinched. He just looked at me sadly.

"I want to talk to you."

"I don't want to talk to you."

He drew his sword then, let it's blade slide against mine, unnecessarily sensually. I felt he had just had it sharpened.

"Please", he said.

The sound of rain drowned us more than the water it provided did.

And we started battling.

The water splashed around us once more, just as that time I had fallen in love with him, when he had won over me. But this time, it was not at all playful, not at all meant to cool our heat, but it was only hostile.

We battled back and forth, back and forth. There was fury behind what I did, but none behind what he did. He was just keeping me at bay.

Fight me!! Come on, fight me!!

I was desperate for release for all of the things I felt inside me. With a scream, I turned round, and I threw myself over him. He fell backwards, and I landed on top of him, and put the tip of my sword to his throat.

I was panting. When I had knocked him down, I'd lost all control over myself, and had activated my bloodline eyes. I felt saliva accumulate in my mouth out of pure blood-thirst.

Hashirama was looking up at me with dull eyes, his beautiful hair spread out around him, slick and wet.

"I'm what lays between you and peace of your soul", Hashirama said. "Go ahead and kill me."

I kept panting; it was as if my lungs could never get enough oxygen. Hashirama looked determined and I realised, with a pang in my heart, that he expected me to actually kill him.

I can't. I can't because I'm still in love with you.

I put my sword back into its sheath and sat off him.

I left in the rain.

The scent of elderflowers had been washed away from the world.

It took time.

It took a long, long time for the enmity between Uchiha and Senju to settle. And it wasn't because me and Hashirama were in conflict; we could keep that at bay. But the clan members did not want to stand behind us until six years later.

We were both thirty, Hashirama and I. We had never talked about what had happened again after that day at the cliff side, ever. We had avoided each other as best we could, keeping clan-related meetings to a minimum, discussing over letter or messengers when we could.

We had agreed to build our village together. And when Hashirama was made its leader, I decided it was time for me to leave.

I looked at myself in my mirror one last time. I took a deep breath. One final time, I went to the glade where Izuna and Tobirama lay buried together, ashes in the same urn, not even hand-in-hand but closer still.

Tobirama... Until the very end, he'd been faithful to my little brother. He had died protecting him from an incoming sword, but he hadn't been fast enough, causing the outcome to be the worst possible, with both of them dead. But if one would have asked them, they would both say it was the second best outcome, beaten only by both of them being alive since neither of them could live without the orbiter.

I had never felt pain so great as the day I lost my little brother, and an albino man that was as close to a brother to me as one could be.

The lines underneath my eyes reflected int he mirror was becoming deeper with every year, my hair so long and heavy now it gave me migraines sometimes, but I was too lazy to cut it off properly. Instead I kept it at bay by adding more and more layers with a battle knife. I looked at myself one final time before leaving for my final destination.

He opened only seconds after my knock on his wooden door. His face changed when he saw me, from an earthly steadiness to surprise.

"Madara..." he breathed.

"Hashirama", I said.

I hadn't sought him out like this for so many years. But I figured it was the right thing to do. He invited me in. I accepted. His home was cosy and comfortable, that of a man who was at ease with himself and with the world. Hashirama had grown into a stable man, and I couldn't help but feel proud of him.

"I just came to say hi."

Hashirama just stared.

"Madara, what's going on?"

"You don't have to worry."

"But-"

"Have I ever lied to you?"

Hashirama frowned and but his lip.

"No."

"Then leave it. I just came to say hi."

We stood quietly for a while. Hashirama's kind, brown eyes were oddly shiny. He seemed to have figured out I was up to something.

"Can I... Ask a favour?" he finally said.

I have already given you my entire world. Do you want me to pluck down the moon and the stars for you as well?

"Yes", I said.

He asked.

I accepted.