Lumayo Ka Man Sa Akin

Chapter 5

Eight Years Later...

The rain has not stopped pouring ever since Armando was laid to rest almost a week ago.

It still has not completely sunk into Lillian's head all the events that occurred when Armando passed away. While she was trying to close a deal at a convention in Palawan, she received a call from Dina, Armando's personal assistant who replaced Lillian after moving to New York, to announce that Armando suffered from a cardiac arrest. Despite the efforts of reviving him, it was too late.

Armando. Gone.

Sitting by herself in the dining room with a hot cup of Açai Berry tea, Lillian stared at the pool that was only separated by a glass window and a small path. Even though she considers herself self-sufficient, she cannot imagine not having the man who helped her make it through in her life.

She has never felt so alone.

Then she thought about Hugo.

Lillian sighed. Hugo Berenguer. It's been eight years. Eight years without seeing him or even hearing from him although she knew he tried. She was aware of his every attempt to get in touch with her and find her. Hugo was relentless on his attempts of finding her. But that was before he found out that Armando and Lillian got married. 

She did not think it was going to hurt. After all, Lillian knew what she got into. She knew Hugo and his fear of settling down, yet she did not want to tell him about her pregnancy because she knew he would insist on getting married. Despite loving him deeply, she did not want to tie Hugo down for the wrong reasons. She wants him to marry her for the right reasons, for loving her. But she never heard him mention the word love to her. Yes, they made love but that does not necessarily mean he loved her.

She did not want to hurt both of them in the long run so she accepted his father's proposal. At the same time, she was also aware of the consequences. What she was not exactly aware of was the pain of Hugo's pain and rejection. She knew it was going to hurt. What she did not expect was how much it did. She felt Hugo's pain and hers that even now, she still is not sure how she made it through. Hugo never again tried to call, email, or even asked about her ever since. All she knows is that he left the Philippines and moved to Spain.

Worse, with Andrea.

When Lillian found out about Armando's death, she asked Dina if she could find Hugo's contact number so Lillian can let him know. When Dina did, Lillian sat inside her office as she reluctantly dialed Hugo's phone number. Like a teenager, she felt butterflies in her stomach as the phone rang. When somebody finally picked up the phone, her eyes widened and her mouth went try before realizing that the voice sounded familiar but it was not Hugo who picked up the phone. It was a woman. It was Andrea.

Of course they live together. Who knows? They're probably married by now. Lillian couldn't help but think.

Mama. Mommy. Ma. Mama!

She did not realize how lost she was in her thoughts until she heard her seven year old daughter Alyanna say her name over and over again.

"Naku Lillian, hindi ko parin mapatulog ang batang ito." Manang Edna gasped. Lillian couldn't help but smile. Her 7-year-old daughter Alyanna reminds her so much of Hugo. They have the same relentless, stubborn, and happy go lucky attitude that it scares Lillian. Even her facial expressions are just like her father's.

Picking up her daughter, she kissed her cheeks and said, "Alejandra Madrid Valdez Berenguer, next time you listen to Manang Edna ha? You can't be so stubborn all the time."

Alyanna kissed her back before wrapping her arms around her neck, "But I want you to put me to bed Mama,"

Lillian smiled then looked at Manang Edna, "Sige na Manang, ako na ang magpapaptulog kay Alyanna. Magpahinga kana din,"

Manang Edna nodded, "O sige, ikaw na ang bahala. Sya nga pala, may narinig ka na ba tungkol kay Hugo?"

Lillian put her daughter down and said, "Yanna, Mama will meet you upstairs okay? I will be there soon,"

Alyanna nodded and headed upstairs. Once Lillian was sure Alyanna was already upstairs, she turned to Manang Edna.

"Nag-email sakin si Andrea. She mentioned na they will be here to hear Armando's will."

Manang Edna nodded once again, "Ah... Handa ka na bang makita sya at sa magiging reaksyon nya kapag nakita nya si Alejandra?"

Lillian shook her head, "Hindi nya makikita si Alyanna. Hindi ako papayag."

"Wala ka bang planong sabihin sa kanya tungkol sa anak nya? Pang habang buhay nalang ba itong lihim Lillian?" Manang Edna asked,

"Mas inaalala ko ang anak ko, Manang Edna. I can't put my daughter in a situation na alam kong masasaktan lang sya, expecting her father would stick around. Masyado pang bata si Alyanna and if that's what it takes to protect my daughter, so be it." Lillian said without realizing her hands were shaking.

...

"So what story do you want to hear Aly?" Lying next to her daughter, Lillian gently caressed Alyanna's hair.

"I want you to tell me about my papa. How come all of my friends have one yet I don't?" Alyanna asked.

From the very beginning, Lillian always told the truth about who her father is and that is one of the reasons why she doesn't want her to meet Hugo. Alyanna was always aware that Armando is her grandfather but she still called him papito. She told her stories of when and where she and Hugo first met and anecdotes that connected Alyanna and Hugo, their similarities. However, Alyanna's question caught her off-guard because after all the stories that she told, this was the first time she asked why he is not around.

"Well, anak, right now things are complicated to explain. Don't worry, when you're at the right age, Mama will tell you everything, okay?" she tried to explain.

"Does he not love us? Is that why he left?" Alyanna asked sadly.

Lillian pulled her daughter closer to her to give her a tight hug.

"No anak. He loves you. Believe me on that."

Lillian bit her lip. Although she was not exactly sure how Hugo would respond to things when he finds out about Alyanna, one thing is for sure. He will love her no matter what.