kundiman.

chapter 23.

"When will you be home love?" Clara asks through her phone.

"I was invited to the Nike office. I gotta work something out with the advertising team. I think I'm getting a commercial," Jason replies giggling. "I might be back by Tuesday."

"Of next week?" Clara whimpers.

"Yes love, next week."

"Love, it's like this is harder than when you were at UCLA."

"Huhhhh, how?"

"Cuz I got used to waking up next to you na."

"I'm sorry love. I know it's hard. This is our life now."

"I know, I know. We'll just have to get used to it."

"We're in this together."

"Together."

"I'll FaceTime you when I'm back at the hotel."

"Ok. I love you."

"I love you too."

Jason and Clara had recently bought a beautiful house in Houston. But recently, Jason's schedule had begun to pick up. Between practice, games away, and meetings with his endorsers, Jason has started to be away from home more often. Clara has had a hard time adjusting to Jason being away so often. Nonetheless, she shows him as much support as she can.

Clara stays busy by creating as much art as she can. Her art account on Instagram has been picking up some steam, now standing at 150,000 followers. She's become somewhat a celebrity herself, garnering attention after Jason's proposal to her during the nationally televised NFL Draft. Dozens of online articles were written shortly after; "Lady in Red: Meet Jason De Los Santos' Beautiful Fiancée," "Jason De Los Santos, Set to Marry New York Artist, Clara Gonzales." Her main Instagram account now stands at 500,000 followers.

With the newly attained status as a power couple, Clara begins to question if this lifestyle is really what she wanted. Her humble, private New York City life is now gone. Everywhere she goes, someone must recognize her. She becomes increasingly anxious every time she goes out of her house. Not only that, Jason is a bonafide household name now. Jason's popularity has recently reached superstardom, and Clara feels overwhelmed. She had learned to tolerate his popularity from high school and college, but now that he is a huge star in the NFL, they can't go anywhere without being pummeled by fans.

Clara looks outside her window. The trees swaying to and fro, her eyes following the clouds slowly drifting by.

"Is this really what I signed up for?" she asks herself.

She calls Jamie, who got married to Mike just a few months ago.

"Sis," Clara whispers, fighting tears.

"Hey sis, what's up," Jamie replies,

"Sis, I really don't know what to do." Clara's voice trembles.

"Ayy, sis, what's wrong?"

"I- I don't know anymore."

"Sige na sis, what's wrong?"

"It's Jason. Well, it's not Jason. It's- it's my life with him now."

"Ok, so what's up?"

"I don't know if I was made for this lifestyle Jamie. I'm a very quiet, private person. You know that."

"What are you struggling with?"

"Everything Jamie. I feel like I'm living under a microscope. Every move I make is being watched. I feel afraid to leave my own house. I- I don't know," Clara says now weeping.