The story of us// Hyunlix

A part of me died that day

October 2018

It had been almost a month since Hyunjin and I started officially dating, and I was the happiest I had ever been. During this time I also found some time to also talk with Jisung about him and Minho.

"About my cousin?" I asked him while he was taking a big bite of the cheesecake, that I so generously had bought for him.

"Yeah what about him, Lix?"

"Why are you asking me?" he said acting clueless. I rolled my eyes annoyed.

"Well since you two are fucking I thought it would be only fair to ask you how he's doing," I said with a smile and Jisung choked on his cheesecake.

"Shit" he whispered.

"Look, Lix...I'm sorry for fucking your cousin..."

"I'm sure he's doing the fucking, but I'm mad no need to be sorry," I said and he looked at me mouth opened in shock.

"Oh"

"I'm just mad you didn't tell me"

"I thought you'd be mad..."

"You and Minho are the happiest I have ever seen you why would I ever be mad at that you dumb-ass" I sighed.

"Sorry..."

"Now tell me everything"

"You want me to tell you how your cousin is in bed..." he asked raising an eyebrow.

"Ew, no, I mean tell me when and how you fell for him," I said.

"I haven't f-fallen for him...we're just hocking up"

"Bullshit"

"It's true."

"Listen idiot you can lie to yourself but not to me. The way you look at him says it all."

"I-"

"Jisung he looks at you like that too...don't screw this up please for the sake of you both"

"Lix...right now it's not the right moment for me to start anything serious..."

"When has it ever been...you always preferred fucking around. I mean ok, I get it but this time you like him. Why not?"

"Because I have too much shit on my mind right now and a lot of things I have to take care of," he said with an expression that I hated to see on his face.

Sadness, regret, fear.

"Are you ok, Ji?" I said reaching for his hand.

"Not really...but don't worry I can handle this. I'll be fine. I'll tell you about it when I feel like it" he replied squeezing my hand to reassure me.

"Are you sure?"

He nodded.

Liar. Fucking liar.

If I knew what was going to happen next, I would have insisted more that afternoon, but I wanted to respect his choice and let him talk to me when he felt like it.

I regret it now.

"About Minho though...I'm not sure what I feel about him, but you're right I care about him a lot, and he makes me feel good, not only in that way...I mean good as in..he feels right. I feel comfortable around him" he said with a smile.

"Then figure out what that feeling means to you and talk to him. Just please don't do what I did with Hyunjin..."

"You two are a fucking tragedy novel in real life for fuck sake" he sighed and I laughed.