The Prices I Pay ((MIKE ZACHARIAS X ERWIN SMITH X OC))

Chapter 24

Silica sat silently with her back leaned against a tree at HQ the following day, eyes trained on the tree line before her with a cigarette wedged between her teeth. She had lost track of the time she had spent sitting there, and merely focused on the rhythm of her breathing to cease her racing mind.

With Brutus' departure came more unrelenting thoughts of Kenny Ackerman. With her sudden access to him, she had found herself wishing for nothing more than normal parents. The prospect of such a thing had never even crossed her mind before, and the newfound longing in her chest annoyed her. She so desperately wanted to be wanted by at least one of her parents, but deep down knew that they were delusions of grandeur. She knew better than to romanticize such a thing, but found herself unable to help it.

She wanted her dad, and there was no simpler way to put it.

Silica exhaled a plume of smoke heavily as tiny droplets of rain began to fall from the grey sky above her. Her amber eyes slowly moved upward as the subtle rain sprinkled her hair, and shivered under the cool breeze that blew passed her. It was so quiet that one could hear a pin drop. She didn't know what to do with all of the silence.

"There you are," the sound of Levi's voice made Silica turn her head, and the mere look on her face was enough to make him kneel down beside her. "What's wrong?"

"I sent Brutus to Mitras to track down Kenny." Silica said blandly as she looked away from him.

"And?" He pressed.

"And he's not back yet," she replied, exhaling more smoke. "I wanted to get an idea on how he is before I go myself."

"I see." Levi was quiet for a moment as he settled with sitting in the grass beside her.

"Can I ask you something?" Silica asked after another brief silence. She could feel Levi's eyes on the side of her head.

"About Kenny?" He asked in return. Silica slowly nodded.

"You said Kenny raised you for a time, right?"

"Yeah." Was his simple reply.

"What..." she trailed off, speaking no higher than a whisper as she took another drag from her cigarette. "What was he like?"

Levi was quiet again, and as the silence went on, Silica finally found it within herself to look at him. He appeared to be deep in thought, with his brows furrowed as he stared off at the tree line ahead of them. The tense air around them felt suffocating.

"Narcissistic," Levi decided to say, and finally he met her stare. "Cynical. He taught me how to defend myself, and when he thought I would be fine on my own, he left."

Silica withered a bit at his answer, and finally settled with extinguishing the butt of her cigarette on the sole of her boot. "Shouldn't say I'm surprised."

"You look like him," Levi nudged her shoulder to get her attention as he took one of her hands. "In the eyes. Your sense of authority, your mannerisms. Ever since I found out, all I can think about is your similarities."

"Is that a bad thing?" Silica asked, offering him a pointed look.

"No," he replied quickly and shook his head. "You got all of his good qualities, I'd say."

Silica couldn't help but roll her eyes and scoff. "You're just trying to make me feel better."

"That's my job," Levi justified as she rested her head on his shoulder. Another gust of wind blew through them. "I just don't want you to be disappointed."

"That's inevitable," Silica shrugged. "I just want to get it over with so I can get back to my life."

"I know," Levi sympathized and squeezed her hand. "Everything will go back to normal soon. We can only go up from here."